tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16414758062635757822024-03-14T10:24:44.266+09:30Itching for a CoffeeI need a coffee or maybe I need more.
Maybe it's common causality or Cybele's death roar.
Maybe it's the ocean laughing in the rain.
Or maybe a witch war or maybe a new vein.
Naw, I think it's just rebellion dogs driving me insane.Frogzillahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17488972097746540176noreply@blogger.comBlogger293125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-89981211041616279572018-11-05T13:42:00.000+09:302018-11-05T13:42:39.187+09:30I don't drink coffee anymore these days<br />
Well, maybe just bits of coffee in random other fancy drinks.<br />
<br />
Yeah, I been on blogging vacation and will be for awhile longer.<br />
<br />
sapphoqsapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-11568663170083989202015-11-10T22:33:00.003+09:302015-11-10T22:33:47.706+09:30Religion and Politics<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4XPuDei5aK1iVdHOkKj9toY3OVP5d2-z8806lefvsxis-sRN-03aTmVM6VHzdYarKKEzKD5zshBoeQmA0xEphfQORSzTi0YqRkCequ1XiHpjcJv_O1b6r_K50VVCfDTbMhjvheHjWmMM6/s1600/religion.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4XPuDei5aK1iVdHOkKj9toY3OVP5d2-z8806lefvsxis-sRN-03aTmVM6VHzdYarKKEzKD5zshBoeQmA0xEphfQORSzTi0YqRkCequ1XiHpjcJv_O1b6r_K50VVCfDTbMhjvheHjWmMM6/s400/religion.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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The topic of faith comes up a lot these days and of course
it has more to do with politics than religion itself. Of all the divisive issues
out there religion and the offshoots of things that can be called religious
come front and center. It’s almost too easy to herd people in one direction or
another by pointing it out. Most of the time I find it offensive, and wish it
wasn’t an issue. This group likes or dislikes someone because they are
religious or not religious enough, and for all of you thinking smugly that
religion ruins everything, the anti-religious spend just as much time making
dumb decisions for the exact opposite reasons. Most issues that can be
considered “moral” have very little to do with religion at all.</div>
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Front and center is the case of abortion. I make no
decisions based on pro-life or pro-choice standards because it has no bearing
on the greater justice of the world in general. I have no problem saying that I
find abortion to be an amoral form of birth control, but if someone comes out
as pro-choice and everything else they are into seems to be to the betterment
of the world as a whole, I will vote for them. The other side of the coin has
far more people that will walk into a voting booth completely controlled by who
they think will protect the right to abortion. This of course is the right that
everyone has had for over 40 years, regardless of who has won any election.
That is the type of idiot that has been sending the world into the crapper, and
fast.</div>
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Now it seems to be all the rage to talk about the loud
mouthed Presbyterian and the soft spoken seventh day Adventist, but why should
anyone care? On the other side it is the liar against the socialist and I haven’t
heard talk of either of their religion? Last go around it was the Catholic that
almost beat the Mormon to take on the guy that some say is a Muslim but spent
20 years in the church of a black liberation theologian. I agree with Bill
Maher (will miracles never cease) that he is really an atheist, and I could
care two licks about his religion anyway. Two of my best friends are an atheist
and a pagan who happen to be pro-life and believe in Federalism. Unfortunately
neither of them is running for president so I have to choose amongst the
others, and religion won’t play a part in it.</div>
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I personally like the old Ross Perot theory when it comes to
voting for a president. No it had nothing to do with his policies or anything;
it was his last infomercial before the last election he ran in. He asked the
American people to think long and hard about which candidate you would hand
your baby to in a life boat on a sinking ship. I think personally he was trying
to remind people that you couldn’t trust the guy who was president at the time.
I still don’t know his religion but his wife is the “liar” on the Democrat side
of this go around, and I don’t know or care what her religion is. Ross was
right about one thing though, I wouldn't have handed my baby to that guy or his
lying wife. Now we need to consider whether it matters to anyone anymore, while
we argue about someone’s religion, which last I checked was still a
constitutional right.</div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-18446681648399247282015-10-18T11:41:00.002+09:302015-10-18T11:42:21.198+09:30Score Zero for the Non-Helping Office Help<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<em><br /></em><br />
<em><br /></em><br />
<em>No one is a generalist in the doctors' front offices anymore. Everyone has a specialty. There are receptionists who answer the phones after the patient is routed through several menus of choices, insurance mediators, plant maintenance engineers, environmental statisticians, medical records compliance officers, and those-who-ought-to-be-eaten-by-Baba-Yaga.</em><br />
<em><br /></em><br />
<em><br /></em><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I fell the other day. This is not unusual for me these days. The balance problems that I have due to some brain damage acquired in a motor vehicle accident means that every so often despite my best efforts otherwise, I will fall.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> This time, I hurt my arm. Doc sends me for x-rays on <u>Wednesday</u>. I find out on Thursday that I have a broken ulna up at the head where it slides into the elbow. Not the worse fracture certainly, especially considering that there is no displacement. I am managing the pain with over the counter pills taken according to directions.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> Doc wants me to see an orthopedist, a receptionist that I do not know from his office tells me. Okay. I will not see the local butcher, I tell her. Anyone else anywhere else but that one. She says she will pass it on to the referral specialist.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> She doesn't. Actually, she doesn't advise the referral specialist that I need a referral at all. <u>Thursday</u> passes in a haze of little blue pills and a little blue pillow that I keep stuffed under my arm.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> <u>Friday</u> mid-morning arrives. I stop in at the appointment desk to pick up a hard copy of the radiology report. I ask about my referral. I am directed to the referral specialist's window.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I don't know this referral specialist. She doesn't know that I need a referral, hasn't heard anything about my "broken elbow"-- the office help has all referred to my broken ulna this way and I don't correct them-- and in fact has not received any message from the receptionist that I need a referral to a bone doc. I give her my details and leave.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I do not hear from her. It is now <u>Friday</u> at five minutes after four. I call the doctor's office. The new receptionist answers. "All of our referral specialists have left. They are not the usual ones," she tells me as some sort of excuse. She cannot tell me if any work has been done on my referral, if an appointment has been made. Nothing. "Call back on Monday," she suggests. "You won't get to see a bone doctor this weekend anyway. You can see one anytime." She hangs up.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> This is not satisfactory. I call back and firmly insist upon speaking with a nurse. The nurse talks with me, answers my medical questions-- I have never broken or even sprained an arm before-- and then she calls my doctor.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> My doctor calls me back. He will be handling the referral himself on Monday.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><u>sapphoq reviews says</u>: </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><em><strong>To all office workers in physicians' offices everywhere, I have some tips for you:</strong></em></span><br />
<strong><em><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></em></strong><br />
<strong><em><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></em></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">1. <u>Please do not make light of any patient's concern or pain by telling them that they can see a specialist "anytime" or that they will not be getting to see a specialist this weekend anyway</u>.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><em>My referral should have been taken care of on Thursday. I should have been provided with an appointment with a specialist-- or at the very least, a phone number of the office of a specialist-- on Thursday or at the very latest on Friday morning. The appointment itself would not have had to occur on Friday morning. I was not asking for a miracle here. I was expecting the same consideration that you would give your own older relative with a broken body part.</em></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">2. <u>Please do not make excuses for why something was not done in a timely fashion</u>.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><em>Telling me that the referral specialists "are not the usual ones" leaves me to wonder if they are imports from a distant planet. Not helpful.</em></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><em>I may be brain damaged but I am not brain dead. I know that the initial problem may have started when you did not hand my referral to the referral specialist. </em></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><em>I was not proficient at carrying out my own job responsibilities for a number of years myself. I know what slacking off at the job looks like. It looks like you.</em></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">3. <u>Please do not tell me that you do not know if anything was done about referring me to a specialist</u>. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><em>I find it unbelievable that you could not be bothered to pick up my chart-- or the electronic equivalent of my chart-- and physically look at the last page to check if there were any notes about a referral in progress.</em></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Yes, I am on first name basis with my doctor, your employer. Yes I did tell him what transpired in his office in his absence.</strong></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><em><strong>It is your job to know how to do your job and to do your job. Do your job or get a different one. Do not irritate this particular irritating patient because I will not just sit back and "take it." I have a blog and I know how to use it.</strong></em></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<em><br /></em><br />
<em><span id="goog_1787853003"></span><span id="goog_1787853004"><br /></span></em>sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-27397968553549141712015-09-29T22:17:00.001+09:302015-09-29T22:17:12.770+09:30Vicar Vicarious<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT-pQhYViwD0YZh0U4P_WZjvRjbtxTSzhhZF16CNVelQlYbFyzh2u-LiVGMijUEhgngx53ZsyC98riL3XoyV-QHXfQqq-OJQ9vIJCQ7M0DbKxB94LSMIeZtDVe3ZbzGlAZ6_5b5M_-flw-/s1600/popeche.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT-pQhYViwD0YZh0U4P_WZjvRjbtxTSzhhZF16CNVelQlYbFyzh2u-LiVGMijUEhgngx53ZsyC98riL3XoyV-QHXfQqq-OJQ9vIJCQ7M0DbKxB94LSMIeZtDVe3ZbzGlAZ6_5b5M_-flw-/s400/popeche.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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It appears that religion has become a very important part of
society again, now that the far left has found an ally in the Pope of all
people. The far right who has been in the trenches fighting the good fight on
abortion, hand in hand (my ass) with the Catholic church have finally been cast
aside for more pressing issues like amnesty for illegal aliens, global climate
whatever they call it this week, seems warm but who knows, and of course a
favorite topic of the left, eating the rich. Yes now that the Pope is the
little darling of the far left we can assume that the overwhelming majority of Catholics
that vote for far left nutjobs anyway can finally just come out of the closet
once and for all.</div>
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The only real view I have ever shared with Catholics is the
pro life one. The atheist that owns this blog happens to be pro-life (and if it
is at all possible probably more pro life than me) so it doesn’t always have to
be a religious issue, but it always gets dismissed as one. I of course have
always been of the belief that there is a certain moral obligation that anyone
should have with abortion, from the roots of Planned Parenthood (Margaret
Sanger truly believed that Planned Parenthood would help black Americans to
self exterminate) to the fact that most people wouldn’t treat a household pet
as carelessly as they do a fetus. Now of course we have the entire disingenuous
way they are selling fetal tissues and preserving fetus “lives” until they can
be harvested. It’s pretty sick really.</div>
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In turn regardless of how you feel about the abortion issue,
the issue has ramped up to the danger phase. I have always been angry with the
left as they say a fetus is nothing but worthless tissue, but then hide every
aspect of what they do with it. The act like they are actually ashamed, or know
others would be scornful if they really saw what was going on. Worthless tissue
like a mole or a cancerous growth doesn’t get any debate or secrecy when it is
being dealt with; it is just dealt with, because IT IS actually worthless
tissue. You don’t harvest it and if this trend continues you could actually see
farms of destitute women breeding for fetal tissue. Oh that would never happen
right? Well it is about what a woman can and cannot do with their bodies anyway
so why not?</div>
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This is what separated me from the Pope once and for all. I
realize that the Catholic church is a dying creed, and they need to bring more
people into the religion and especially those that are already inclined to be subservient
to a master, but to hug and kiss a brutal dictator like Castro, and then come
here? To not bring up the one and only thing that the bulk of America has had
in common with the Catholics and simply so not to offend their New Leftist
friends, during a time when the Pope had the stage? No thank you, I’m perfectly
fine with myself and happy to be without them.</div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-78544591348093874352015-09-04T23:47:00.004+09:302015-09-04T23:47:40.380+09:30Stay Out of My Happy Place<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyDi3IPmuyUi3R5C7lqGM1ilbr5EOfHLwMxyWPb8IwrjDbzNE1XZ66KmE8m1mI0r30T9b9Lob8O32IfCBhXLFUUwhQNE1sU16GbuzA02GISZx53DX7P08q1_ZOWCZ6YDSK8WQIBa_h8Tbl/s1600/69876879pl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyDi3IPmuyUi3R5C7lqGM1ilbr5EOfHLwMxyWPb8IwrjDbzNE1XZ66KmE8m1mI0r30T9b9Lob8O32IfCBhXLFUUwhQNE1sU16GbuzA02GISZx53DX7P08q1_ZOWCZ6YDSK8WQIBa_h8Tbl/s1600/69876879pl.jpg" /></a></div>
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When I am at the gym, I just want to think about health. I
just want to talk shop, and shop would mean things that pertain to picking
things up and putting them down enough times to build muscle. I may like to
dally in the idea of what I am going to eat, and what supplements we think is
best, but that is about all that I need to deal with when I am in my happy
place. You see because when I am in my happy place I don’t want to talk about
the things that aren’t relative to the happy place like politics, religion or
morality. These are not happy place subjects’ folks, and what is worse than
that I happen to be a self righteous jerk, so I can only stand pestering by an
idiot for so long. This was a day that started to look unsalvageable, but I
will explain further.</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
There are very few people at the gym that know I even have
political, religious or moral views, and unfortunately my big mouth is the only
reasons a few do. On a brighter note the average gym enthusiast is a lot harder
to find than you would think. Sure we all have our groups on the internet that
hang out and talk shop, but that is global in scale, and the average gym will
only have one or two people that always seem to be there. I am one of the two
where I work out, and the idiots that want to argue politics, religion and
morality are not. Of course that doesn’t mean that the average pain in my ass
doesn’t run into me once or twice a year either, and here was one of those
days. He was locked and loaded for argument from the moment he walked in.</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Now despite what most people might think of me I have NEVER
allowed politics, religion or morality to end a friendship, or even stew in
myself for more than a hour, maybe two if it was that bad. Life is too short,
and there are enough people in this world who completely disagree with me that
are fine people. Then of course there are very few who are not, but I still don’t
waste my time hating on them. This one person in particular, I haven’t seen in
at least six months and they must have spent that entire time thinking up what
they were going to say to me the next time they saw me, but of course doesn’t
have their facts straight when dealing with me. “So what do you think about that
person in jail in Kentucky who wouldn’t issue marriage licenses to gay people?”</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Of all the subjects in the world that people have always
tried to pin me down on I really hate the gay marriage one. Why? Simply because
I have never been against gay marriage. I have told everyone this but when they
have their brain in the fog they always assume that I hate the issue, when all
I hate are the people who won’t get over it. Without getting to crazy, I
explained to the idiot that the woman should have been fired because moral
issue or not, if she couldn’t do what is her actual job because of a moral
issue then she should find another job. I actually said that the Massachusetts Supreme
Court had committed a crime by making gay marriage legal and then holding their
judgment for 3 months so the Mass. Congress could create a new law. Once the
MSC proclaimed gay marriage legal it was legal, and not up for a “holding”
period. I have never wavered on what is and is not legal.</div>
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The problem now is that because I didn’t give the person the
argument that they had come to me for, they were obligated to start hunting for
one. I really hate that. His favorite at that point is to go straight after abortion,
because I am pro-life. He’s one of those atheists that demands Christians admit
they are wrong about things. Anything actually, it doesn’t matter; he just
wants me to be wrong. I’ve had these arguments before and it isn’t worth it,
his religion of atheism is (faith is faith folks) gets really bothersome so I
tried to blow him off. This of course means he is right, and he started
celebrating this. Well until someone else decided to step in and continue the
argument.</div>
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I’ll long story short this one too, but the other friend was
quite disdainful of the whole topic, and came right out and asked the associate
that started all the arguments, why morality is something that only the religious
seem to have in his eyes? That really enraged the first person who started in
on the whole “your God, your God,” thing. The other person pointed out that he
too was an atheist but was also pro-life, because wrong is wrong. Again that
made the person crazy, and he started arguing that he had to be a “God freak”
to think that way. I completely stayed out of it, but the second person managed
to argue how the Ten Commandments didn’t affect either of their lives, murder
is murder (the second one is a vegan too from what I gathered) and that if the
first one equated all morality to be something that “Cults” are into, then he
would rather be in a “Cult” than in his world.</div>
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I had a good workout, and I have a feeling I won’t have to
see that idiot again for a while. I guess the day was salvageable.</div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-86947527609429558862015-08-11T02:01:00.002+09:302015-08-11T02:01:26.616+09:30Damn He Was Bookin and then BOOM<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3PX4dKG2OGG0qk1aoVhncoDqG2QVrZFmwqGf9NTrmBOYEabCabXw5N5GujoWgVT4a3ZqCjNV7Zh3Mc6veH2OtubbCgU4RgMQ5oun_zdgKQBOu8M48iybPz1Tnl0MXCW7ERGH-ASdPeNGk/s1600/image+%25282%2529.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3PX4dKG2OGG0qk1aoVhncoDqG2QVrZFmwqGf9NTrmBOYEabCabXw5N5GujoWgVT4a3ZqCjNV7Zh3Mc6veH2OtubbCgU4RgMQ5oun_zdgKQBOu8M48iybPz1Tnl0MXCW7ERGH-ASdPeNGk/s1600/image+%25282%2529.gif" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Remember back in the day when the fastest thing known to
mankind was something we affectionately called “bookin?” I mean when you simply
dug down deep and were running faster than the human mind could possibly
comprehend your friends would label it with the “bookin” tag, but more often
than not you were explaining how you personally were “bookin” and then it was
usually followed by something bad. “Man I was bookin, and then the neighbor’s
dog came out of nowhere and BOOM! I swerved and hit that tree!” Friends would
commiserate with you about that rotten dog, and how lucky the tree was to still
be standing.</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
There were other forms of “bookin” that had to be explained
a little differently of course. Your friend that was a little on the pudgy side
(of course back when I was a kid you would have called them fat, but the
Politically Correct police are everywhere these days) was doing something
called “truckin” and even though it wasn’t as fast as “bookin” (of course) it
was a heck of a lot more dangerous. “Man Spanky was just truckin along and the
neighbor’s dog came out of nowhere and BOOM! They buried the dog last night,”
and of course there was “screamin” which was the really skinny person version.
“Man Alfalfa was screamin along and the neighbor’s dog came out of nowhere and
BOOM!” then you would all meet at the hospital to see how Alfalfa was doing.</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Nobody really talks about these things anymore. I mean old
farts like me sit around and act like the youth today doesn’t understand what
it was like to walk to school five miles in a hail storm up hill, then learn
about how Carter didn’t mean to make it so you couldn’t afford candy anymore,
and then walk home 5 miles in a hailstorm up hill. You couldn’t do any bookin
in a hailstorm or uphill silly, but you look at these kids today and they don’t
even comprehend the concept of bookin or truckin or anything that doesn’t
happen on an X-Box. Maybe that’s the problem, we need to explain to them how
important it is to do some bookin (or truckin) now and again so that they don’t
get too lethargic? Now kids get on a school bus that drives them across the
street to the school, then at the school they don’t even play on huge wooden
structures loaded with used tires, because they are unsafe! Hailstorms cancel
school.</div>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m amazed actually that there is any bullying going on in
school anymore, because that would take some effort. When I was a kid I went to
school, the school bully beat me up and took my stuff, and it was a valuable
life lesson. Don’t bring stuff to school and cover your face. Today it is all
about teasing, and writing nasty things about each other. How the hell do we
train politicians if this is the considered bullying? Maybe if the kids did
some more bookin (or truckin) and a little less sitting online (between X-Box
exercise) then the participation trophy world we live in could accommodate more
people going out and getting a job and less time sitting on a corner
complaining about student loan debt. Oh wait, we don’t teach kids to succeed or
fail anymore, we teach them to gather up the participation trophy, and complain
about name calling to their shrink. I give up. I’ve become my worst nightmare,
my grandfather.</div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-84716959695130120612015-06-26T01:49:00.001+09:302015-06-26T01:50:37.469+09:30Are We Finished Yet<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
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Are we there yet? Remember that great phrase as it was
hoisted upon either you as a parent or you to your parents. There, was the
place you wanted to be at all time, and you never seemed to get there quick
enough. Well just because we aren’t in a car, and we aren’t technically on a
trip anywhere, we still have a problem with all of the people that desperately
want to be “there” and could give a crap about here. What am I talking about?
My two favorite topics actually, and we are merging them at an alarming pace
now, so I hope you have buckled up for the ride. Here is my list of “Are we
there yet?”</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Catholics are
officially a co-opted faction of the looney left</b>. I mean I have been saying
this for years but now that the Pope is acting like the European Al Gore, with
his councils on climate change, and talking about how we should all give until
we are poor, can we finally admit they are mostly socialists? I’m sick of
people lumping them in with the people like myself who are generally demonized
as being a right wing whacko. I’m fine with being a right wing whacko, but I am
offended to the core that people put the people who keep Nancy Pelosi in
office, voted in force for an idiot like John Kerry, and never met a Kennedy
that they wouldn’t step in front of a train for. See I didn’t even have to go
back to the Borgias.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>George W. Bush is
officially a complete and utter failure</b>. Many people who drank that flavor
of Kool Aid, at least had the fact that “he nominated two conservative Supreme
Court Justices” to fall back on. The problem is that the “Chief Justice” that
he nominated is like most Republicans, totally humiliating to anyone who would
call themselves conservative. Throw in the fact that GW never defended himself
and allowed the news media to create the perfect platform for the fool that
replaced him. Yeah total failure.</div>
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<br /></div>
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<b>The plantation is a
lot larger than it was in the 1860s</b>. People hate it when I bring up this
simple fact, but the black community has given themselves mind, body and soul
to a single political party. The other political party would be stupid to try
and drag them away, and the party that already owns them has no reason to do
anything for them. The party that owns their vote is now working on the “illegal
immigrant” vote because it is a more volatile voting block and their personal
interests completely clash with the black community’s personal interests. Thank
God they have them sown up on the plantation, so they don’t really have to
worry about them anymore.</div>
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<b>As goes Texas so goes
America</b>. I keep an eye on Texas because I hope to move there as soon as my
kids get out of school, but have you noticed that some of the worst things
happen in Texas now? Years of dragging people from other states, illegal
immigration, and creep from the big cities is turning Texas into a peetrie dish
of the worst of the worst. This is the only one that I don’t consider “We are
there,” but we are unfortunately on our way. Once they turn Texas blue, America
is over.</div>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
One of the biggest problems with the world today is that
everyone sits in denial of the horrible things that go on around us. You can
bring up the social creep, the fact that the news media just admitted that
Valerie (the right hand of our president) Jerrett’s entire family had FBI files
for several generations because they were hard core communists, but it doesn’t
matter now. It always comes down to “it doesn’t matter” after 3 years of
calling everyone crazy for saying it, then 3 years of outright denial, then oh
her parents were communists, but that’s old news. It isn’t old news, it’s never
been news. Are we there yet?</div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-15128322670637272692015-05-30T03:41:00.003+09:302015-05-30T03:41:44.388+09:30Freedom of Speech and the Right to Offend<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfBbBMHKW6vNTyDCjbIyURYt4N3MMJEXXYTnkQrkDyjAYtcQiVr3jv-HaOy2tCNo5i190yz-VUNdtDTADgPdDgtuANqXSXX6HXlpce4SV2L6AYj6f5F2E8jV9tFrOjrIzt8Jr8Rsw4KinK/s1600/mh3d2xnkttfrfsi5m2ig.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfBbBMHKW6vNTyDCjbIyURYt4N3MMJEXXYTnkQrkDyjAYtcQiVr3jv-HaOy2tCNo5i190yz-VUNdtDTADgPdDgtuANqXSXX6HXlpce4SV2L6AYj6f5F2E8jV9tFrOjrIzt8Jr8Rsw4KinK/s640/mh3d2xnkttfrfsi5m2ig.jpg" width="484" /></a></div>
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It appears that part II of Cowboys and Muslims will be
taking place at a mosque in Arizona during their largest prayer session of the
week. I have absolutely no respect for the people who are doing another “Draw Muhammad”
contest that should be starting in about seven hours from now. Sorry folks, I
can’t show disrespect for the person who dips a crucifix in urine and calls it
art, just like I can’t respect anyone who want to make Muslims feel miserable
by doing this. Wrong is wrong, and I am breaking from the ranks of those that I
assume are usually on the same side of political debates as myself.</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
The throngs of bikers that will be armed in the area to
protect those that are “executing their rights to free speech,” kinda makes it
look even more lame to me. I mean, sure you will probably need them since it is
a stick in the eye of radical Islamists who solve all their problems with
weapons, but having absolutely no compassion for those that just find it all
insulting and want to live THEIR lives in peace, cannot be ignored either. I
have no dog in the fight actually aside from speaking out for human decency.
Arizona is about as far away from where I am as anywhere in the United States,
I never served to defend our flag, and I probably have too many Muslim friends
that would never think of carrying a gun to defend their religion. I also speak
out about teachings in Islam that are probably criminal, and this is no way to
show them.</div>
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Think about all the people in Garland Texas who had to be in
fear of the reprisal from the last stunt like this. Just because you think you
are taking it to the place where the shooters might have worshiped, doesn't
mean that the people in that Mosque tonight deserve this. Even if the place is
radicalized, an act like this could serve to radicalize them even more, and
then you just allow that to seep out into the streets where I assume there are
a lot of people who are going to know what the people in Garland had to deal
with. Oh did I mention that you are still being outwardly insulting for the
sake of making a point?</div>
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The drum has been beaten, and I feel like I have said my
peace. I will be fast asleep about 3000 miles away from Arizona tonight while
this is going on. I will sleep well actually because I don’t think I have the
right to be incendiary, despite the fact that some would say I am and often. I
don’t specifically go after a religious group because I don’t like the way they
worship (and yes that is what you are doing) and I definitely don’t drape myself
in the flag, and surround myself by armed people to do it. To be honest with
you it sounds a lot like the people you think you are making a statement
against if you ask me.</div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-21865338424155398092015-05-19T01:33:00.003+09:302015-05-19T01:33:48.120+09:30Shoot Out at the Not So OK Coral<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMXtmNPE1Hb_DmwMngdtNYBINzCMqukdAfBmyM149RTSIjK8-r-skPw7xriRsxJPMg9cuB8NnYVDo6b6n5_kR7ZefrE_F0IDYxJPKQtkn8L4L5Of23dcgvfa9Ci7dcPoaBymQY_uwBEQzf/s1600/15+-+1+(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMXtmNPE1Hb_DmwMngdtNYBINzCMqukdAfBmyM149RTSIjK8-r-skPw7xriRsxJPMg9cuB8NnYVDo6b6n5_kR7ZefrE_F0IDYxJPKQtkn8L4L5Of23dcgvfa9Ci7dcPoaBymQY_uwBEQzf/s400/15+-+1+(2).jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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Remember the show “Undercover Boss?” I don’t actually know
if this show is still on the air or not, but I do remember that I loved the
show when it came out, thought it was ok the second season, tolerated it for
the third, and then I remember the exact moment I stopped watching it. It was
the “Twin Peaks” episode, where about 15 minutes into the episode I just said
to myself, “Self? I have had enough of this show, and I really hate the owner
of Twin Peaks.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Seriously there had been plenty of owners as the show wound
itself out for me that I couldn't stand, but the owner of Twin Peaks was the
one that finally did it. He was a jerk, a misogynist (and I don’t say that
lightly, you can run a place that exploits women, but this guy was over the
top) and I just hoped that nothing good would happen for this guy. I definitely
didn't want to stick around for the end of a show I was slowly growing to hate,
to see him be the benevolent dictator, like that show always seems to end. I
really looked at this place as somewhere I would never want to go, where bad
things were bound to happen.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Well apparently yesterday bad things happened at a “Twin
Peaks” and although I am not leaving the perpetrators out of the equation I am
not going to let a place run like a wild west whore house off the hook for in
the end having a wild west whorehouse atmosphere. Two rival biker gangs managed
to have a good old fashioned “shoot out” and 9 people ended up dead. I mean I
am not for censoring things, I definitely don’t want to come off as a moral
crusader, and I am perfectly fine with people spending their time how they
want, but the “Twin Peaks” culture from the owner on down SHOULD be discussed
in this whole ordeal in Waco Texas. Sue me!</div>
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<br /></div>
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I can’t get that television show with that smarmy little
worm smugly explaining his business model, and the bad taste it left in my
mouth. Yeah I realize that it is a very bad reason to write something, but I at
the very least hope that someone throws a microphone in front of the benevolent
dictator of Twin Peaks and asks him about it. Wriggly little worms deserve to
squirm, and you can’t expect all press about your “ideals” to be good,
especially when your ideals belong back in the mid nineteenth century. He
obviously forgot an old saying in the life business which is a play on the
restaurant business. You order shit, you eat shit.</div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-64795010675743442502015-05-01T12:59:00.000+09:302015-05-01T13:21:55.204+09:30Let's Talk About Rape<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvYH10CbsmvyeTqHU69g757OGfue7qabLxXkiAi-N7U2vMFReSV9Wvw_dHDuNmz3gMAiK0MWLHdcUkIsJw6_q0AtTzVUf07SZlT94xnP6lla4PVk-R9j0aLvOXQjsNVCQfARlYjT7g6zI/s1600/43015_sk_00387.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvYH10CbsmvyeTqHU69g757OGfue7qabLxXkiAi-N7U2vMFReSV9Wvw_dHDuNmz3gMAiK0MWLHdcUkIsJw6_q0AtTzVUf07SZlT94xnP6lla4PVk-R9j0aLvOXQjsNVCQfARlYjT7g6zI/s1600/43015_sk_00387.jpg" height="400" title="uprooted tree trunk" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">uprooted tree trunk with bits of dirt clinging to its' roots and rootlets. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> The woman approaches the stage. Her cheeks are painted red and her eyes are glowing with something other-worldly. I hold my breath. I know this is going to hit me right in the gut. Give it to me, sister. I am ready.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> She warms up to her subject. The re-telling of her life gets more and more sordid and convoluted. The dam breaks and the lights shatter. </span><span style="font-size: large;">"I was the one who decided to get into that van with those men," she said. "No one forced me to do that. I was responsible for my rape that night."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> Already I can feel myself collapsing inwardly. This I was not expecting. I was not ready. No one should have to be that brave. That strong. That needy. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> I stare at the other members of the audience. I am the Other. Everyone else is nodding in approval. Some are clapping. I want to vomit. A guy passes me a piece of cake. Stuff the emotions downward. Something else to focus on. I lift up the sugary fakeness with a plastic fork. I don't enjoy the taste of it at all.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> Nine more minutes. People are smiling. Laughing. How could they? Let them who have the ears hear. I groan inwardly. Ain't nuthin' going to fix this. I focus on my breathing. On the walk I took with my dog and her doggie friend today in the woods. A purple trillium was blooming and the mayapples were busting out all over. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> Seven minutes. A friend leaves. He is wiser than I am. I stay to witness the debacle. Why do I do this to myself? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> A woman walks over to me and gives me her phone number. I glance at the name on the paper. She seems to think that I ought to remember her. "I'm working now," she says. "Odd hours. Call me." I stuff the paper into the pocket of my hoodie. "Sure." I glance at the name she has written down. Sheila. At her face. Never seen this woman before in my life. I will have to ask someone later. I am face-blind. My prosopagnopia seems to bother others a lot more than it bothers me. I've gotten used to it. It hasn't gotten any better but it hasn't gotten any worse either. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> Three more minutes left in the performance. </span><span style="font-size: large;">I know full well that there are people who are capable of manufacturing rape incidents out of their imaginations for their own twisted satisfaction or monetary gain. I have seen the results of such machinations up close. I despise people who manufacture their own victim-hoods. They are scum. They make a mockery of the human beings who are real victims. The woman up on the stage is not making it up. </span><span style="font-size: large;">What kind of society allows victims to claim responsibility for the actions of their predators?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> She spends her last minute talking about her triumphs. But it is too late. I am fried. Is that someone crying? I cannot tell in the profound darkness. The woman exits the stage. The applause is thunderous. I cannot join in. Broken, I sing my way home.</span>sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-71284900458095917862015-04-28T20:52:00.000+09:302015-04-28T20:52:06.649+09:30The Journeyman Writer of Blog<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhy5lrQ0h2Wt-L7qoJgYispXa9Dbm0KheYBlS6R-0l14xOjgDq2Ygho_9mWdjEANoGHujW-6tJzRx4R_N3ejiGfWjZnDGEvAccWoOoM_TzOTz7-d-fuHtUOTBBrkJtUrh5hsptKmNxCdE7G/s1600/roflbot.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhy5lrQ0h2Wt-L7qoJgYispXa9Dbm0KheYBlS6R-0l14xOjgDq2Ygho_9mWdjEANoGHujW-6tJzRx4R_N3ejiGfWjZnDGEvAccWoOoM_TzOTz7-d-fuHtUOTBBrkJtUrh5hsptKmNxCdE7G/s1600/roflbot.jpg" height="200" width="146" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I received my Google check the other day for the advertising
on my blogs, and it got me to thinking that someday I may have to start
thinking of myself as a business. Theoretically you have to make over $400 a
year on your various schemes .. um .. I mean .. business ventures, and there is
a good chance that this year I could do that. It would be a first, and that
probably just made everyone who knows I have been blogging for ten years run
for the exit out of here. Yes, it takes a very special person to get rich off
of blogging and you aren’t reading one of them.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What’s probably worse, is that the “I am a writer, and
blogging is a side gig,” crowd is about to get their balloons burst too. For me
to pass that whopping $400 mark this year I have to add in my book sales
revenue too. It’s been a banner month on that front as I have sold the second
most amount of books as I have in any given month. That number would be 3, and
it is eclipsed only by the month I sold 7, but then again 5 of those were to
myself. You probably are wondering why I can be this honest about these things
and it is because lying about it doesn’t do me any good.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Back to the theory I throw out there a lot and why I do so.
I am a blogger who writes a lot, and it is a great hobby all things considered,
because a lot of hobbies end up costing you money. All things totaled, even if
you include the amount of money I paid for my website, the graphic design
software that I use to keep it all in order, a few small upgrades o certain
things et al, I have made enough money to pay for all of that. Now I am making
gravy baby! Ok I am making peanuts, but again my hobby is free from this point
on and more over I will probably make enough money along the way to buy more
upgrades to my operation, maybe even a new tablet, as long as it is a cheap
one.</div>
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<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yeah forgive me for taking you on a scatter path through my
scattered mind. Of all the things that my blogging, web design, and social
media engineering has afforded me, you can throw in the friendship, the ability
to help others, and even slather in a bit of laughs here and there. The best
laughs come at my own expense. What I am really very proud of is the fact that
other people seem to like my writing enough that they ask me to write for their
blogs. Of course they could just be desperate, but that doesn’t mean I have to
tell myself that. It’s just a hobby after all so taking it too seriously would
make it a job. YUCK!</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
If you like this crap, you are the type of person I need. Come see the other crap I write over at <a href="http://thewhacko.com/">TheWhacko.Com</a> or don't, see if I care!</div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-79334926305982888832015-04-14T22:15:00.001+09:302015-04-14T22:15:18.281+09:30What I Earn Through Me and Others<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW3mNdFy4uJy5cfDKsCZbw8BEmE5cXlai9t_mIeY_9iP9n7VK8ReSe0GE64PRIbAQrofAz59LZYN2T2qBDyn8bkYyHTRQgluLvIdYpiNzPdF_hPHLaDii-C6fyuZvnlry17gr_hIRn442O/s1600/15+-+1+(2).gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW3mNdFy4uJy5cfDKsCZbw8BEmE5cXlai9t_mIeY_9iP9n7VK8ReSe0GE64PRIbAQrofAz59LZYN2T2qBDyn8bkYyHTRQgluLvIdYpiNzPdF_hPHLaDii-C6fyuZvnlry17gr_hIRn442O/s1600/15+-+1+(2).gif" height="200" width="200" /></a></div>
It’s Tuesday morning, and like I do every Tuesday morning, I
gather up all of the trash, and package it up for the garbage men to take it
sometime after I go to work. Over the last few months this was quite the
miserable task, freezing cold, fingers numb, icicle hanging off my nose, but
today is beautiful out. The air is warm, there is a cool breeze flowing in from
the west, and yes I am enjoying taking the garbage out. I earned this, and as I
didn’t bitch about the snow, and I thoroughly enjoyed the great workouts shoveling
it, I have now earned this beautiful weather in which I will take walks and
enjoy wearing less clothing.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m sure people get really sick of my attitude. That Jeremy
just brags about his health, talks about politics like he knows something,
rambles on about history, and acts like he is the greatest blogger ever. I earn
all that too, every day. I write, I go to the gym, I stay up on current events,
and I read a lot of history. I keep a positive attitude because I have to. Deep
down inside I am the most negative, miserable human being on the face of the
earth. I was a miserable drunk, blacked out all the time, furious at the world
and starting fights with everyone to get even with everyone for a miserable
childhood. Boo Freaking Hoo. You are what your parents make you and if you
choose to stay that way then BLAME YOU.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
To be honest with you all, which is what this particular
blog of mine is all about, I had to learn to turn my misery outward. No that
doesn’t mean that I share my misery and transpose it on others, it means that I
enjoy the misery of others especially if they bring it on themselves. Does it
mean that I wish misery on others? Nope I wish everyone could be as happy as I
am, but the fact of the matter is that most people won’t be more often than
they can’t be, and I get a chuckle out of it simply because I am grateful that
I am not that person anymore.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I just dealt with snow banks that were taller than myself
the entire winter, and I did it with a SHOVEL not a snow blower. I was grateful
for all of the exercise I got, and how healthy it made me feel. I was elated
that I could actually do it and do it very good at that. I was grateful to all
the people living down south who thought they were giving me a hard time,
knowing that right about now as all my flowers are popping up, full of all that
water that has been leaking steadily into the ground, they will be crying and
complaining about droughts and heat. I am living a gorgeous day. I don’t care
if it rains, the temperature goes through the roof, or falls into the cellar,
and nobody can take that away from me, other than me.<o:p></o:p></div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-81966267728189228902015-03-27T20:09:00.000+09:302015-03-27T20:09:05.924+09:30We Don't Have a God Problem<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOopSiH-bFQ0cX68zGabO4spANKYsVzZqOBTCgWom_TLqIyOKnVfIEJHmEZwc0MsUw-bodyy77DQL1JMiKT4EBDR3ECustQ-ge76biaq40-2O8sIEfG_6CiX1VNnnmA5JXft1TiLy3fYsl/s1600/ad-thecrow02.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOopSiH-bFQ0cX68zGabO4spANKYsVzZqOBTCgWom_TLqIyOKnVfIEJHmEZwc0MsUw-bodyy77DQL1JMiKT4EBDR3ECustQ-ge76biaq40-2O8sIEfG_6CiX1VNnnmA5JXft1TiLy3fYsl/s1600/ad-thecrow02.jpg" height="256" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Let’s share a broken record moment, just for the sake of
those that haven’t read my past work, but I have said for years that whether
you like the Bible or not, 2000 years ago it was the greatest survival manual
ever written. There are a lot of things in the Bible that were written in the
context of “rules handed down by a vengeful God” that when executed properly
would extend your life. Kosher eating laws for example when viewed today are
really nothing more than common sense based on the times. Eating a pig was a
50/50 proposition, if it wasn’t cooked properly, and by the standards of the
time it wasn’t really possible. Milk and Meat mixed together created a deadly
proposition, when you considered how the bacteria interacted, again 2000 years
ago. Human sacrifice was EVERYWHERE, and it was monotheism that basically ended
that.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Of course it is a 2000 year old book regardless of whether
God had his scribes write it down or not, there were humans involved, and we
are amazingly flawed creatures. It’s in the bible trust me. I am a HUGE fan of
religious history. I have sat through seminars, does some schooling, read all
the major religious writings. I’ve read the bible several times, the Qur’an a
couple of times, the book of Mormon a couple of times, and the Hadith once. The
Hadith was when I realized that I didn’t have to analyze everything; some
things just are what they are. Every one of the religious texts (aside from
Dianetics, L Ron Hubbard was a cut rate science fiction writer, no more no
less) has some value, but of course some really bad ideas by today’s standards.
I know, I can get into a biblical slap fight with the best of them.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
2 Thessalonians 3:10 "For even when we were with you,
this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat."
That is my favorite quote out of the entire Bible. It sums up the Christian
work ethic that I like to think I have but more over it is another one of those
life skills that progressives try to beat out of people. It also is important
to know that one for when a progressive starts quoting all the places in the
bible where we are supposed to feed and clothe the fat and lazy. That is where
it rests in my mind and that is probably the furthest I will ever really use
the bible to justify my behaviors.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The real problem in society is the way others use the
religious works to justify their behavior. Some find reason to kill, some find
reason to be intolerant, and others find reason to enslave. I find reason to
remember that there is only one King, and that is God. You don’t have to call
her God to get the point, but you have to accept that you are NOT the most
powerful thing in the world. Again to the progressive mind set, where they
refuse to admit that God placed an angel with a flaming sword in front of the
entrance to Eden, to keep human kind OUT. Anyone that promises you a one way
trip to Eden (Utopia) as long as they get to be in charge, I assure you is
probably representative of an angel that fell from Heaven and is sitting down below
waiting for your loyalty.<o:p></o:p></div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-13172748371776871712015-03-19T20:35:00.000+09:302015-03-19T20:35:04.984+09:30My Name Is Jeremy And I Am What I Am<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-i_CdOwyhZ-0/VQqtFRX9oFI/AAAAAAAAlkA/FAKt3eFpSm8/s1600/15%2B-%2B1%2B(5).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-i_CdOwyhZ-0/VQqtFRX9oFI/AAAAAAAAlkA/FAKt3eFpSm8/s1600/15%2B-%2B1%2B%285%29.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It took me a long time to admit that I was an alcoholic. The
theory behind it was pretty sound. I drank too much, I made an asshole out of
myself, burned a few bridges, passed out, woke up and started the whole sick
cycle carousel all over again. This isn't anything strange if you have seen it
and you aren't so codependent that you could justify it. No the “long time”
aspect of the disease in general was due to the fact that I never had really
finished myself off properly, and had to keep destroying my life, to finally
get to where I needed to be.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Unfortunately where I need to be was 19 years old, living in
a strange city and starting a new job that was beneath me or anyone else that
wasn't at rock bottom. The hopelessness had to sink in and then I had to accept
that I needed to fix me for nobody other than me. That sounds easy enough to
most people, but there is where the problem of alcoholism lies, because we tend
to not be most people, so the solutions to our problems as simple as they would
appear to someone else is pretty damn difficult to us.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When you finally do get in tune with whatever form of self
improvement you are working on, then you have to deal with your social
inadequacies, or just add them to the list of excuses that you use to stay
damaged. In my case I had to come to grips with the fact that everyone has
feelings and emotions and just because I was an alcoholic didn't mean I
cornered the market on them. I also had to realize that the way I dealt with
feelings and emotions was completely and utterly self destructive. This made
for a much greater set of problems that it took me many years to come to grips
with. I liked to believe that I was the last person in line, while at the same
time understanding that I thought I was the center of the universe.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This is where the humility came into it all for me. That
“power greater than myself” whether I chose to call it God or anything else,
wasn't just something to pull out of your bag of tricks when you needed someone
or something to blame for why I was so screwed up. I was so screwed up because
I used my free will to do things that were stupid. Pretty simple when you think
about it, but to someone who considers themselves the center of the universe
and placed no value on anything greater than them, it was a complicated issue,
that required the humility to accept that I ain't all that.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This was where I finally had the chance to make something
out of myself. Actually it was my first and perhaps last opportunity to make
anything out of myself aside from a falling down, stinking, filthy drunk. In
theory I was already pretty good at that, and again I hadn't even made it to a
legal drinking age yet. Beyond the obvious my biggest issue was that there was
never going to be enough alcohol to fix what I wanted to fix inside myself, and
I was never going to stop trying to get there anyway. This was where I had to
turn to God, because on the off chance that there isn't a God (which to me
really isn't up for a debate) I did in the end realize that God helped me to stop
drinking, and start on a path to a better life.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
How could I come to this conclusion, in all of the haze that
was the first few years of freedom from alcohol? The answer is pretty simple.
God was the only entity that I asked for help, and actually did help me. In
that aspect I don’t have to know that there is a God, or there isn't a God. The
faith that I was able to be a better person, and grow both mentally and
spiritually has very little to do with all of the “life” crap that has happened
between now and then. I can have a bad day or a good day. I can wake up angry,
sad, happy, confused, disheartened, furious, joyous or one of over a million
ways, and that is only the beginning of the new day. It rarely ever ends the
same way it started and I would have it no other way. Of course I wouldn't know
any other way at this point, and for that I truly thank God.</div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-35049250139346696312015-03-12T17:55:00.002+09:302015-03-12T17:55:45.838+09:30Of God and Reality and Especially Both<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG32nZn2A1dJAK5VK92oC6Dy_dcjYICuEiX_iLv4DvvXdegXrKdkgOQ_Cc9PN2HY94jIKDdVUVQLjIaYeq_-6DXDuCJQn2VvJ6EY_9AJOK4U6VQY8Aa20GM5wdVFyb-YRDrMXMKrec8OgN/s1600/whtmarch.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG32nZn2A1dJAK5VK92oC6Dy_dcjYICuEiX_iLv4DvvXdegXrKdkgOQ_Cc9PN2HY94jIKDdVUVQLjIaYeq_-6DXDuCJQn2VvJ6EY_9AJOK4U6VQY8Aa20GM5wdVFyb-YRDrMXMKrec8OgN/s1600/whtmarch.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a></div>
Do you ever just find yourself completely consumed with the
afterlife? I do quite often I am sad to say, and often my conversations with
God would force some around me to question my sanity. As with anything else in
our lives, the micro management of what time we do or do not have left on earth
has got to enter into it now and again. Of course I do believe in a God of my
own understanding, and probably more for scientific reasons than purely faith.
I do have faith that there is something beyond all this, but on the other side
of the coin I just don’t like a lot of scientific theory either.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I was a child for example I was fed the company line of
“the rain-forest will be gone in twenty years” and nearly forty years later the
last Greenpeace mission to survey the Amazon rain-forests have yielded that
about 3% are gone. It also yielded the founder of Greenpeace to quit, because
he felt stupid over it all. This was “settled science” though when I was a kid
and my children got the same load pressed on them. By pointing out to them that
it had been more than twenty years since I had been told this only reinforced
what the teachers are trying to get across. Daddy lies and he’s an idiot.
That’s modern science for you folks.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There was that big bang theory that I was taught somewhere
between 8 and 12 years old. It was also a fact and the only reason I don’t
remember exactly what grade I was first taught this was because it was also the
first time I really sat down and thought about scientific theory. It got lost
in those years because I realized that it sounded stupid, and I was just going
to stick to my guns on that one. I could even relate to some of the scientific
reasoning for it but after it was all said and done, I wasn't going to proclaim
Christians, idiots for having a theory which was equally as provable. See what
I did there? I took something that someone else called science and then I
turned it into what it really is, faith, and compared it to something else that
we call faith, but at the same time can call impossible.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I really don’t know. To be honest with you there are a lot
of holes in science that are either filled by a zealot, or left to be dis-proven
over time. The big bang theory is one of these things, so now if you cling to
the big bang theory you are officially in the same boat as monotheists.
Theoretically they could both be right or wrong, but the only way that science
can be settled is when you have proven with 100% certainty that all other
possibilities are false. Good luck with that one on the really big issues like
climate, the universe, or even the presence of God. If you can eliminate all
other possibilities to any of these things with 100% certainty you are on
another plain of science. Most of the time the person who claims settled
science is merely lying, which would prove a scientific theorem that the most
possible answer to any problem is also the most probable.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In the end if you take a person like Bill Maher or Richard
Dawkins who are so sure of their knowledge that there is no God that they can
mock those that believe in God, then you would have to place them in the
category of “faith” based theory as well. Their “faith” just makes them feel
better about themselves in the here and now just as my faith is a God makes me
feel better in the here and now. I would like to say that if you live your life
as a good person who believes in God, just to find out that there is no God in
the end, have you suffered any? There are people out there that would say you
have but in many cases it is some form of their own failings that they are
projecting onto others. If you live your entire life as a good person who
doesn't believe in God and find out in the end that there is one, have you
suffered any? Probably not, but you didn't get to live your life believing that
those that deserve to go to Hell actually do, like I did. I wonder if God hates
that about me?<o:p></o:p></div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-4238490001737661212015-03-04T17:14:00.001+09:302015-03-04T17:14:15.715+09:30The Two Hands of Help<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgI6rZx1YhyphenhyphenRmqwAOPuVPSOHqTj6AA16kWP2kusQvlVXy31PpHZ8wkDjO3Xq2nWpktzdEtFMlLM97jA-jgsh7Rd1IhhM7twHeHVuuQnA8TKEahTlcaIoGhpP2uBYQMYCKsVRGiqLqOwY10l/s1600/2015+-+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgI6rZx1YhyphenhyphenRmqwAOPuVPSOHqTj6AA16kWP2kusQvlVXy31PpHZ8wkDjO3Xq2nWpktzdEtFMlLM97jA-jgsh7Rd1IhhM7twHeHVuuQnA8TKEahTlcaIoGhpP2uBYQMYCKsVRGiqLqOwY10l/s1600/2015+-+1.jpg" height="320" width="269" /></a></div>
Ever go through your feed on whatever social networking you
happen to frequent and see a lot of people whining and complaining about things
you have talked about? I imagine that there are two trains of thought on this,
and I have fallen victim to both of them. The one hand would get bitter because
you pointed out a remedy to whatever ails the person sitting on the pity pot,
and the other hand would smirk at how the person sitting on the pity pot
ignored you when you pointed out the remedy that ails them. A better person
than I would just comment on the post with the same remedy that you have
pointed out before, but I only play a good person in blogs.<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m willing to admit that I am a jerk, so I gave up on the
whole trying to help the helpless. This doesn’t mean that when I say, or write,
or point out things it falls on deaf ears. It actually doesn’t, and I happen to
be grateful to the people that thank me for something I said, or give me
updates on their progress from something I shared. I know differently, and
there are certain people in this world that really don’t want help, they just
want an audience. I have learned to enjoy the smirk, even if it translates into
the misery of others at times. YOU HAVE TO DO THIS!<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
There are a lot of different types of people in this world
folks. I can’t list all of them but a couple that need to be pointed out for
the sake of sanity is “the needy” and “the helpful” which people get confused
about. There are people who are genuinely needy and a hand up is all they need.
They then take the opportunities and get on with their life, usually grateful
for the assistance. Then there are those that are always going to be needy
because it is in their nature, and all they do is suck the energy out of the
helpful until there is no energy left for the genuinely needy. Hate to be
blunt, but there is no honor in wasted effort.<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
If you don’t learn to dissociate from those that aren’t
actually looking for help, and genuinely trying to live off of the pity of
others then you will never have time. They are out there in spades, and it
could end up being a Walking Dead episode in your own life. I hate to get
biblical here but Jesus had a pretty good point when he said “Follow me; and
let the dead bury their dead,” which has helped me through many a bad scenario
of allowing my own pity to cripple me. The “life” experience which to me was
concluded from that passage out of Matthew was, “Our job is to carry the
message to the living.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Above all else in your life, let me give you this. I learned
a long time ago in meetings I sat through to deal with my own problems, where
everyone remains anonymous, that you need to take care of you. You need to
trust God or whatever entity you place in the position of being more powerful
than you. You need to help others because that is what makes you a human being,
and not a human doing, BUT you need to be realistic as to who needs help and
who doesn’t. Place a price on your time and understand if someone deserves to
use that time or not. Some people are worth a billion dollars worth of Jeremy,
and others aren’t worth a dime. At least for the love of God figure out who
treats you with the same respect of time and energy you would like to give to
them, before you give it to them.<o:p></o:p></div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-11319742393282026172015-02-26T18:59:00.003+09:302015-02-26T18:59:43.133+09:30Score One for Big Jeremy<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3cL7uNREgTdWnwSsD0fqT_nuE8FEdAvyewF5KN9WEC7bebQSnKsjxmkx5_l03xEIa2JO0VL7Rptr4eX2HtPRZ4vxw8mWfGZ3HVs4CZBsegTNH-3i03Yc9ChmKzx-fO3zIcE_penbJeBVa/s1600/15+-+1+(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3cL7uNREgTdWnwSsD0fqT_nuE8FEdAvyewF5KN9WEC7bebQSnKsjxmkx5_l03xEIa2JO0VL7Rptr4eX2HtPRZ4vxw8mWfGZ3HVs4CZBsegTNH-3i03Yc9ChmKzx-fO3zIcE_penbJeBVa/s1600/15+-+1+(2).jpg" height="200" width="200" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If you look back on your life do you believe that you have
accomplished everything that you were born to accomplish? I mean I realize that
the last thing anyone really saw themselves doing when they got older is what
they are actually doing. When the obvious had hit me, somewhere around the age
of 25 that I wasn't going to be a rock star, a movie star, a master theologian,
or the myriad of other things I had explained responsibility away with. The
restaurant jobs I had supplemented dreaming with, had to come to an end.
Responsibility was never my strong suit, and believe it or not there is a lot
more responsibility that goes with a services job than people give them credit
for.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Of course my childhood was never plagued with the dreams of
being an extruder operator, an electro-mechanical assembler, or even a welder
which made up the 20s of my life. The 30s got more interesting for a bit when I
tried my hands at building Aegis systems, robots, and ovens for the Asian
soldering industry, but again, this wasn't a dream or a nightmare to the little
me I left behind. Neither were three divorces, well OK maybe since that’s how
famous people live, but I had always
wanted the children, just living in a mansion collecting royalties. Then again,
I had at least established that I was a pretty good worker when I wanted to be
by that time.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Believe it or not the first job I had actually settled into
and accepted as my own fate was being a janitor. I was good at it, not much was
expected of me, and I had a lot of time to goof off. Pretty sad if you think
about it, but I definitely didn't expect it to accidentally lead into a job as
an MRO (maintenance, repairs and operations) which is corporate speak for “I
buy stuff.” Nope I think back to when I was picturing myself as the lead singer
of the biggest band ever, or the multi-talented screenplay writer, who
coincidentally starred and directed in the movies because it was too important
to leave to anyone else, to even the recluse writing great novel after great
novel, and this just wasn't in there.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Well let’s get to the other things that weren't on the
radar. Never thought I would be a raging alcoholic before I even made it to 21.
Didn't think I would be sober since before I was 21 either. Talk about an
accomplishment but that is an absolute affront to my nature. Who knew I would
still do a lot of the dumb crap alcoholics who are drinking do while I was
sober? Well it makes for interesting tales anyway. Who would have thought I
would love my stupid job buying crap? Well the person who recruited me to do it
did, so I have to give him the kudos on that one, and of course my wife who
gave me the gentle nudges too.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
All in all, the little Jeremy wouldn't like the big Jeremy.
Aside from the fact that little Jeremy was a dummy, he also didn't know that
there was anything else out there other than being a rock star, a famous
athlete, a movie star or even someone who had died at the age of 27 like all
the famous people in the sixties seemed to do. The good news is that the big
Jeremy likes the big Jeremy, and the big Jeremy also understands now that the
little Jeremy didn't know squat.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Now for a shameless plug. If you like to read whacky stuff,
from a whacko like this guy, you can always find the random crap that flows
through his mind at <a href="http://thewhacko.com/">TheWhacko.Com</a>. Thanks for making it this far!<o:p></o:p></div>
Jeremy Crowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11872102864997603476noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-75237847450908835172015-02-24T11:52:00.001+09:302015-02-24T11:52:16.950+09:30What Happened to Aye Aye?<br />
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiruAfP4Rs0Jp5t43odz560nBU4wjf5yK03VRkIexmx5pEIgdsluPMgTB_JJ_HIqbqqtiJoDqC-_oM-KfxMwHiNB_-Fa0pA1GpyuTrkXi0T49LofUZxnI6nHjDtVry9V5FxN39T8jJEc2w/s1600/gossipisugly).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiruAfP4Rs0Jp5t43odz560nBU4wjf5yK03VRkIexmx5pEIgdsluPMgTB_JJ_HIqbqqtiJoDqC-_oM-KfxMwHiNB_-Fa0pA1GpyuTrkXi0T49LofUZxnI6nHjDtVry9V5FxN39T8jJEc2w/s1600/gossipisugly).jpg" height="320" title="a monster head in the snow with tongue sticking out caption: Gossip is ugly." width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i>I took the picture myself and added the caption with my legally obtained copy of photo-altering software. You can save it to somewhere on your computer and re-upload it to anywhere on the Interwebz. Link backs are not necessary. If however, you are a copyright troll, your presence here is totally unappreciated. So go away and go bother someone else. No love for the DMCA.</i></td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Aayisha had been in the local x.a. meetings for many years. She went back out after six years or so and then came back in for six more years. She was a gentle soul, the only one of my friends who was willing to visit my dad at our house-- some friends were willing to have me bring him to their houses though-- and the three of us enjoyed some sun-tea on the back deck one afternoon. Aye Aye treated Dad like he was my dad. Not like he was my Dad with a terminal neurological disease that was eating his brain. Not like he was my Dad who was escaping from his former life. Just like a regular guy who happened to be here. She gave him a rare gift that day.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Aye Aye earned six years of abstinence in the rooms of x.a. the second time but then she found another way to remain free from active addiction. Unfortunately, the other way was an organization which had the characteristics of a manipulative religion. [A cult, okay? The new words that are supposed to describe "cult" just don't do it for me]. I suspected that we had lost her several years before another friend did. That hurt.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Even so, a few good times remained. But then she stopped returning phone calls or answering her door. We knew she was home. She just refused to answer the doorbell. We were broken-hearted but there was little we could do about that. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">This past summer, Aye Aye signed up for hospice services from the same place that helped my dad. She died in early February peacefully in bed with her family around her.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>drama queen man: </b></span><span style="font-size: large;"><b>"Did you hear what happened to Aye Aye?"</b> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>me (beginning to seethe): "No. What happened to Aye Aye?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>drama queen man: "She committed suicide and police found her body in her car."</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>me: "Oh really. Who told you that?"</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>drama queen man: "Some guy told me. And he ought to know."</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">my housemate: "Huh?"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>me (to housemate): "Information without names is bullshit."</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>drama queen man: "Her picture was in the paper and everything."</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>me: "Her picture was in the paper next to her obituary. Aye Aye was receiving hospice services. She died. At home. In bed. With her family around her."</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">drama queen man: "Wella--"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">me: "If you spread that around, I will be very angry. And it isn't true besides. She did not kill herself."</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">drama queen man: "Oh you know me. I wouldn't do that."</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">But he was willing to make the claim to me. I guess he didn't realize that Aye Aye and I had ever been friends.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><u>sapphoq itching for a coffee says</u>: Before you open your fat mouth in the rooms of recovery or anywhere else about what you know, think is true, or what someone else "told" you, please consider your motives. Gossip is ugly.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Sometimes we do things to each other, in spite of our abstinence. Don't make my burden heavier because you want people to think who you are ergo you spread false information around.</i></span>sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-33523503538371764092015-01-27T12:12:00.001+09:302015-01-27T12:12:25.491+09:30An Indictment<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Recently, several of my close associates have gone back out. People with time measured in years, not months. People who were doing all the stuff that people in recovery are told that we must do in order to keep on keeping on. People who were working steps, had service commitments, went to meetings, used their sponsors, read the literature, took care of themselves, lived up to their responsibilities, had deeply held religious beliefs and practices to match.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> So far, they were all lucky enough to make it back into the rooms of recovery. So far, they are all staying in. So far, so good. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> They all have said it is a struggle to remain clean now. More of a struggle than before. They have had various consequences for their relapses. What those consequences are is of no importance to anyone reading this blog post. None of them "got away with it."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> I had my lapsing and relapsing during the first nine months of my attendance at x.a. meetings. Then I began to understand that I had to quit all of it and not just the drugs that I perceived of as having been or helped to create the biggest problems in my life. So I did. I got honest. [Unlike my buddies, I was not honest about what drugs I was still taking during those first nine months]. I started over. Starting over was tough. Staying away from <b><u>all</u></b> of the drugs was much more difficult for me than staying away from some drugs.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4WTRD37DzL1rJmFvPVVz8_jCFGmJUlA4memRm6pgnl-l0qGyeRjyU6ZAGhG_EGfrgVDbnCqN5NPCHVC0dPyaCNG3Dt8aZVx7_QEqpV6ODSQTkJtYj6nw810jNJbPSeqUNdOk4G9iObag/s1600/addictiondefn.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4WTRD37DzL1rJmFvPVVz8_jCFGmJUlA4memRm6pgnl-l0qGyeRjyU6ZAGhG_EGfrgVDbnCqN5NPCHVC0dPyaCNG3Dt8aZVx7_QEqpV6ODSQTkJtYj6nw810jNJbPSeqUNdOk4G9iObag/s1600/addictiondefn.jpg" height="320" title="I made it myself. Take it if you want to and re-upload to social media as you will." width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"> There is something here I've been thinking about a lot. We-- at least here in the United States-- really do not know enough about how to treat addicts in the throes of their addiction. Most of the addiction treatment industry organizations here are heavily dominated by twelve step approaches and philosophy with bits of pop psychology and pseudo-religion thrown in.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> The stats from the rehabs that are honest about the results of treatment via long-term follow-up are dismal. I've heard various percentages ranging from ten percent on up through thirty-three percent. One in three down to one in ten will remain abstinent. The other figure I've heard tossed around is one in four will relapse some percentage of the time and therefore are declared to be "improved."</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> These figures ought to be unacceptable. They certainly are unacceptable to me.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> The best that professionals in our country can offer is "Well, some of you will be dead. Some will bounce in and out. A very few of you will remain clean." </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> <b><u>But meanwhile</u>, </b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...if you relapsed, then your program or the way that you worked the program sucked or wasn't good enough.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...if you relapsed, then you quit going to meetings or didn't go to enough meetings or got disconnected from meetings even if you were going to meetings.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...if you relapsed and killed yourself, then you weren't working the program and forget all the foolishness about whether or not you had a separate disorder that has suicidal ideation as a prominent feature.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> <b><u>Furthermore, your relapse had nothing to do with </u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...our treatment protocol, </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...our failure to give you culturally competent treatment, </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...our failure to screen you for other disorders, </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...our failure to help you determine what support systems you want to use in order to not use again after you leave us, </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...our failure to recognize that x.a. programs may not be the best way to go for everyone,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...our failure to lobby for more research into the best ways to treat people with addiction, especially if some of those ways just might include stuff other than a twelve step philosophy.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> <b><u>Beside that</u>,</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...One quasi-religious group is heavily involved in the addictions treatment industry for adults as well as in prevention programs for school kids. The adults are treated with mega-doses of certain vitamins and exposure to the group's ideology. The kids pledge not to use drugs and are also given links to certain websites where they too will be exposed to the group's ideology.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">...a certain troubled teen industry group whose founder and staff are predominantly of a certain religion are heavily involved in the addictions treatment industry for teens. Those teens are lumped in with all the other "troubled teens" in their residential <strike>schools</strike> hell pits of torture.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">I am not a fan of the quasi-religious group nor am I a fan of those places where staff go beating on kids and throwing them into extended periods of isolation and otherwise severely mistreating them.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> <b><u>We are at a crossroads and we don't even know it</u>.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><u>sapphoq itching for another coffee says</u>: People are complex. The etiologies behind addictions are multi-factorial. By subscribing to total immersion into the twelve steps and x.a. culture, the majority of the organizations involved in the addictions treatment industry are failing to recognize that more ways of treating addicts seeking relief from active addiction need to be researched and developed.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> By failing to do so, other organizations which are not noted for their honesty or humane practices will step in to fill the void. These other organizations claim to have better outcomes. We don't call them on their dishonest stats for fear of litigation or because we figure they are the experts or perhaps we've learned we ought not to criticize those agencies which are religious in nature.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> <b>Because we fail to broaden our scope and we fail to demand ethical research into other more efficient ways to treat addicts in order to yield more successful outcomes, addicts will die. Addicts who could have been saved if only we knew more about how to treat them. Period.</b></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span>sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-3235414719361554502015-01-03T12:42:00.000+09:302015-01-03T12:42:47.946+09:30Dealing with Death in Recovery<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Dad died on Christmas Eve holding my hand. I am truly at peace with his passing. He was sick for a very long time. Some folks in the rooms have asked me, usually before a meeting, "How's your father?"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> "He's dead," I tell them. I don't know why that answer </span><span style="font-size: large;">[seems to, an any rate] creates a bit of discomfort. Whether there is an afterlife or not [and I don't think there is one], my father is out of it now. He no longer has to force himself to function when it's easier to just allow the dementia to take over. He no longer has to deny arthritic pain or hide his ever-decreasing short term memory. He no longer has to fight to stay awake and interested in his surroundings.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> I've been at twelve step meetings where the topic was coping with the death of someone. When I experienced the loss of a grandfather three months into my own recovery [and was still a believer in divinity], I brought up that topic myself. The usual platitudes were offered to me. Y'll know the ones I mean...</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> He's in a better place now.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> You'll see him again.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> Using won't fix the pain.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> and others which basically boil down to the same thing: The loss of someone near and dear to you is not permanent. It's a very long temporary, that's all.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I made this myself. You can save it to someplace in your computer and upload it to anywhere on the interwebz. I don't care. Credit and link back to here are not necessary. Copyright trolls are not welcome here. If you are one, go away now please.</td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> There is a hegemony of Christian cultures in the United States. That gets tiring to me at times yet quite frankly, I think there are worse kinds of religious cultures that could predominate. Yeah, modern Christianity has produced the Westboro crew and the fake healers [someone please explain to me though why it is that there aren't any modern verified reports of said televangelists via their g-d giving amputees new limbs. See: </span><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="http://whywontgodhealamputees.com/">http://whywontgodhealamputees.com/</a></span><span style="font-size: large;"> and</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.christianforums.com/t6986184/">http://www.christianforums.com/t6986184/</a> and</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="http://rantsandrage.com/2011/05/01/god-hates-amputees/">http://rantsandrage.com/2011/05/01/god-hates-amputees/</a> and</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.godandscience.org/apologetics/why_wont_god_heal_amputees.html">http://www.godandscience.org/apologetics/why_wont_god_heal_amputees.html</a> and</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/godhatesamputees?f=realtime">https://twitter.com/hashtag/godhatesamputees?f=realtime</a> to get the gist of my question]. I understand that a large majority of modern day Christians do not stand with the Westboro folks or with those preachers who are frauds. I'm saying that for all the good that modern Christianity has done, there is also some not so good. There are degrees and percentages of good and bad in all social, political, economic, religious, and bowel movements. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> When people wish me a Happy Christian Holiday, I warmly wish them the same. When people tell me that they are praying for me or my dad, I warmly thank them. My believer friends are not out to get me, convert me, or inflict massive butt-hurt upon me personally by wishing me a Happy Christian Holiday or by expressing their concerns by letting me know that they are remembering me in their prayers. If I sneeze, a polite "G-d bless you!" ought not be a reason for a war. I'm too fricking old to fight every battle that presents itself to me. Some of those battles are not worth fighting. I leave some of the ones that are worth fighting to the younger folks coming up behind me. Because you see, I am old. I have to conserve my strength and energy.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> I've gotten off the main point of this blog post already. Didn't take long at all. Okay then. Nuff.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> I came into the rooms believing. Through the years, I've lost my faith and had to grapple with the realization that I am ipso facto an atheist. I tried to disguise this particular turn of events for a long time by hiding under the umbrella of some sort of quasi-pantheism or quasi-animism. There are either bunches of spirits around who really aren't gods or perhaps there is divinity in everything from cancer cells to cockroaches and beyond. When those things became too intellectually discordant for me to bear, I gave up. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> As a non-believer with quite a bit of time abstinent from active addiction, I chose not to bring up my dad's demise as a topic at any of the twelve step meetings I attend. Why?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> 1. I don't want to use over it.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> 2. I accept death as permanent.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> 3. I lost one person. My dad lost everyone.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> Here are a couple other reasons why I didn't bring it up as a topic:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> 1. I have the benefit of a huge support system: my actual friends [not the many acquaintances] both inside and outside of the rooms, professionals, a few selected relatives, and hospice.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> 2. Some folks in the rooms [just like some folks who don't need to be in the rooms] tend to discount feelings or distance themselves from uncomfortability by remarking upon the supposed transient nature of loss and that's simply not where I'm at. </i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i> 3. A few people in the rooms tend to feed on other peoples' stuff. I'm not into, "Oh you poor thing! How are you feeling? Are you alright?" I'm way beyond that sort of thing.</i></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I made this myself. You can save it to someplace in your computer and upload it to anywhere on the interwebz. I don't care. Credit and link back to here are not necessary. Copyright trolls are not welcome here. If you are one, go away now please.</td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
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<span style="font-size: large;"> The facts are simple. My father is dead. Through my direct advocacy, the caring concern of various professionals and other helpers, and hospice, my dad had a good death. He was kept as comfortable and as free from pain and anxiety as possible. I was with him when he died. Dad died holding my hand and smiling. I miss my dad however there is no way that I would want him to live any longer than he did given his failing brain and progressive physical debilitation. Dad is gone, yes. He left a lot of love behind. And that is truly awesome.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I made this myself. You can save it to someplace in your computer and upload it to anywhere on the interwebz. I don't care. Credit and link back to here are not necessary. Copyright trolls are not welcome here. If you are one, go away now please.</td></tr>
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<br />sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-314789544464750932014-12-10T14:00:00.000+09:302014-12-10T14:03:20.346+09:30Unity or Uniformity<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Twelve step programs-- although very much retaining the monopoly on what the majority of American treatment and rehabs offer in terms of how to maintain abstinence-- may not be the best fit for every patient or client or participant seeking to get free from addiction. This is something that we often ignore while bemoaning those who have darkened the doorways of 'our' meetings [and 'our' treatment facilities, if we happen to be staff at one of them] who went back out or continued to use. We are so fond of claiming that various addictions are now a disease of some sort. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"> What kind of people are we when we blame the patient for failing to gain or regain health after one or more bouts with a disease?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> When a cancer patient gets sicker and dies in spite of the chemo or radiation, do we blame the patient?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> When someone gripped in the natural course of a non-reversible dementia progresses and dies in spite of medical interventions, do we blame the patient?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> And yet, the addict seeking help is blamed for his or her return to active addiction. [I use addict to also include those who are addicted to alcohol]. What gives? Maybe we don't really believe in the disease concept. [Okay, I don't. I don't claim acceptance of the disease concept which seems to have swept the addiction treatment industry by storm].</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> The problem does not lay in how we define addiction. Whether it is a medical condition with multiple etiologies and a disease-like progression, an actual disease, something else entirely, or a combination of these things is not something that I am taking issue with in this particular blog post. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> While how we define addiction certainly does determine whether or not insurance companies will pay for treatment, it is not really at the crux of the problem. The problem is the low success rate ascribed to addicts seeking recovery. When making a decision related to my health, I seek out more than one option. And when the success rate for an option presented to me is described as anywhere from ten percent to just under thirty-four percent, I certainly do my research. I want the odds to be in my favor. In cases of severe and/or chronic and/or terminal diseases or conditions, there may not be better odds or very many viable options. </span><span style="font-size: large;">Science offers us the opportunity to discover and describe best practices in medicine.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> In the United States, I think what we are suffering from is a lack of rigorous research into the multiple causes of addiction, treatment options, and how to determine the best fit for each client or patient. Twelve step programs have aided many of us in changing our lives thereby enabling us to become and remain abstinent. Yet, some percentage of people fail out of meetings with or without adjunct professional help. Not every human being is able to find a new way of life within the current structure of treatment and maintenance of abstinence. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> There is no one way to recover. Yet, one way to recover utilizing the twelve steps of various Anonymous programs is what is pushed by the addictions treatment industry.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> We have today other ways to develop social support systems-- there is Celebrate Recovery [for Christians], Secular Organizations for Sobriety [or s.o.s. for non-theists, and for those who may be religious but wish to separate their religious practices from their recovery program], the Red Road [for Native Americans], Women For Sobriety [for women], Double Trouble and Dual Recovery Anonymous [both organizations are for those who also have mental health diagnoses], Rational Recovery [for rational people], Drug Courts [for non-violent offenders-- which include may include attendance at support groups and rehabs and/or a residential program] and more. Some of the programs utilize re-written forms of the twelve steps. Others do not. And some people do maintain abstinence via their religious practices and no attendance at any sort of program.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Some of us discover that a twelve step program is the only program available to us. Even if we are able to travel some distance to attend a meeting that is not X.A., non-X.A. meetings may not be held as often as we may like. And yet, there are a number of people for whom a twelve step program is not sufficient, adequate, or appropriate. Fortunately, within the Interwebz, we can find others who are thriving outside of the 12 step rooms.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> The sorry state of treatment programs today does not allow for options other than the twelve steps. People are not told that there are other options or ways to recover. And as far as truly personalizing treatment to the individual addict, that does not usually exist. A few addicts may be lucky enough to land in a program that recognizes that medication-assisted recovery, concurrent mental health treatment, or harm-reduction strategies may be better suited for certain patients but that is not, generally speaking, the experience of many addicts who have sought treatment. And we just don't know enough of how to figure out which addicts will do best in which options. We need more research and more development of alternate resources for those seeking recovery today.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> The thing is, none of us practice recovery in the specific ways it was described in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. There are scattered groups of individuals who are attempting a return to A.A.'s early times. And that's cool.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> For some of us, that sort of thing is not appropriate or useful. We don't fit. We need the stuff that we resonate with, whether it is participation in X.A. as it has evolved in these times or some other form of social supports. And some addicts do not resonate with X.A. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> We do not have to be addicts kept in uniforms lined up against the wall waiting for lunch to begin, as if we were still in a regimented high school. The unity of a healthy twelve step meeting is truly a wonder to behold. A healthy group acknowledges that we can practice our unity in spite of our differences.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> We are not all the same. Some addicts need something else in order to recover. So let's quit blaming them for failing out of what we have to offer. Treatment providers need to learn how to fit treatment to each individual addict rather than fitting each addict to their brand of treatment.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> I envision a place where the characteristics of each individual patient is respected and where patients are offered more than one way to recover. Someday, we will know enough to stop blaming those who fail out of the system and instead invest in research that will truly illuminate best practices in addiction treatment. Until then, more of us will die. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><u>sapphoq badly needing a coffee says</u>: I count myself fortunate that I have been able to make a life for myself within the recovery landscape as it exists today in my geographical location. My hope is that</i> <u><b>all of us</b></u> <i>who seek a way out will indeed be able to discover a way out. But that isn't the way it is YET.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
For information on how an atheist can remain abstinent in a twelve-step program, buy my e-book "Another Atheist in Recovery." If you aren't an atheist, then buy my e-book "Up the Rebels" which is a hacker/slacker kind of a novel.<br />
<a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/SpikedUp-Frog?store=allproducts&keyword=SpikedUp+Frog">http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/SpikedUp-Frog?store=allproducts&keyword=SpikedUp+Frog</a><br />
Neither e-book has DRM. They are written in ePub format which can be read on many readers and also on your computer via Calibre or other reading program [but not Adobe tm].<br />
I support the torrents so if someone wants to make my e-books available to others for free, that would be really cool-- and supported by the Creative Commons license that I used.sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-88531094178528720162014-11-22T09:12:00.001+09:302014-11-22T09:14:00.045+09:30A missed #AddictionChat<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">@LEAFcouncil from Wednesday night's 9 P.M. (E.S.T.) #AddictionChat on Twitter (tm) asked me to answer some of the questions from this past Wednesday. I had no time to go. I was teaching myself how to format so I could get my two e-books published. Ten hours later... I did!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Okay, here goes then:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>1. Introduce yourself, what brings you to #AddictionChat and where you're from.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>SpikedUpFrog, my computer brings me here and I'm from the Interwebz.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">2. <b>In your opinion, what is the role of spirituality in a person's recovery?</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I don't know. I know what awe is but the concept of spirituality has not been personally useful to me.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I don't accept supernatural or preternatural claims at this time because good-enough evidence for these claims are lacking. Unfortunately, for those not affiliated with a religion, "spirituality" can lend itself to New Age beliefs and mysticism.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I understand something about belief, which is why I don't much argue with those who find comfort in faith. I have witnessed the harm that New Ageism can do and am much against that sort of thing.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>3. Must a person be connected to a formal faith community to have long-term recovery?</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>No.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I've been continually clean since September 8, 1980.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>4. Some believe that 12-step programs are cult-like. Do they require a belief in God?</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Thinking that a 12-step program is cult-like or has some characteristics of a cult is a separate question from the requirement to believe in God.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Alcoholics Anonymous shares a few characteristics with "cults" but also has some differences from a "cult." There is a newer word for "cult" but I can never remember it. It is actually a phrase. Not "newer religious movements" either. Something else referencing the manipulative nature of cults.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Bill W. was raised as a Methodist. He joined the Oxford group which was an evangelical Christian sort of outfit. The recovering alcoholics chose to separate from the Oxford group because Roman Catholics were threatened with ex-communication if they retained their association with the Oxford group.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>The Big Book was set up with the idea that an A.A. member would believe in a God or would come to believe in one. This is most evident in the chapter to the agnostics.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Having a door knob as one's higher power does not work any longer when Bill W. went on to mention that the higher power that one chooses must be personal and loving. A door knob cannot love you. Neither can nature.</i></span><br />
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<i style="font-size: x-large;">@SeanStOnge has the right of it when he talks about the Big Book and what it says about a belief in God. </i><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>According to the Big Book, belief in God is absolutely necessary. The phrase "as we understood him" was added due to the intervention of an atheist in the rooms. The man called "Ed the salesman" was an atheist and in spite of what Bill W. wrote about him, he remained an atheist. It is reported that he penned a book about being an atheist in long-term recovery but I haven't located a copy yet.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>For those of us who have a sincerely held non-belief, we have to do something else.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>5. What about atheists? Does "spirituality" in recovery apply? How do they adapt 12-step programs?</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I don't use the word "spirituality" or the phrase "spiritual but not religious." I had to re-write the steps so that way I could work them and remain in recovery.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>6. How does spirituality enhance a person's recovery? This question applies to those with faith, agnostics, and atheists.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I don't do spirituality because I have not found it a meaningful term in my life.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>7. When new to recovery, the "Higher Power" thing is a mystery. How does one figure that out?</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I came in believing but as I progressed through my recovery, I found it more intellectually honest for me to be an atheist.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>8. What are some ways that a person can nurture their spirit and enhance their recovery?</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I don't recognize spirit as being something real. There are things that human beings in general can do and do do in order to nurture themselves and make a better life for themselves. People in recovery are not so different from other people.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>9. When it comes to holidays, how does a person in recovery navigate faith if it is different from their family's?</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I live in a country where right now it is not dangerous to self-identify as an atheist. My family situation is such that I am out to them as a non-theist. I eat Thanksgiving with them. I give presents to the nieces and nephews for Christmas. There is nothing that I have to do unless I choose to.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>10. Finally, if someone has questions about faith/spirituality and recovery, what resources would you suggest?</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>If they are believers or they want to believe, I refer them to members who do believe. If they are atheists, agnostics, free-thinkers, secular humanists, or nones, they can go to the aa agnostica website or some of atheist forums which do offer support to those of us who are clean. There are also other means of recovery which are not 12-step oriented such as S.O.S.-- James Christopher's program Secular Organizations for Sobriety or Save Our Selves-- Women for Sobriety, and a few others.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I've covered the resources for folks like me in my newly published e-book called "Another Atheist in Recovery" up at Barnes & Nobel. It is an ePub so it can be read on any reader. It is also free from D.R.M. because I hate the D.R.M. You can buy the book if you are really interested in one example of how an atheist might work recovery at: <a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/anotheratheistinrecovery-spikedup-frog/1120799496?ean=2940150475434">http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/anotheratheistinrecovery-spikedup-frog/1120799496?ean=2940150475434</a></i></span>sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-48611603509173879842014-11-10T00:13:00.000+09:302014-11-10T00:13:25.199+09:30Holidays and Holidaze<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Since I first got clean, people have been complaining and whining about "the holidays." I did too. At some point, I got over it but a few others perhaps did not. Recovery is as easy or as hard as we make it. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Here are some things you can do in order to not have meltdowns over a time of year that can be enjoyed or ignored rather than feared:</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">1. If you don't like a holiday or don't think you can manage to stay abstinent/ clean/ dry/ sober, then cancel it.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> * Not recommended if you have children. *</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">You can always visit the relatives the day after for leftovers.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>My best Thanksgiving was the one I spent in the woods with my dogs and a couple of hiking buddies. For a meal, we heated up cans of turkey vegetable soup in a fire that we built in the snow.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">2. You can volunteer at a soup kitchen or other place that is serving meals to those who need one. This just may get you out of yourself long enough to understand that not everything ought to be about you now that you are in recovery. </span><b style="font-size: x-large;">You can</b><span style="font-size: large;"> </span><b style="font-size: x-large;">take a newcomer with you</b><span style="font-size: large;"> to volunteer.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>My elderly father volunteered in a soup kitchen on Christmas one year. He has Lewy Body Dementia but at that time he was able to manage being a volunteer for the day. He enjoyed himself immensely.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">3. You can ask to work so that some other co-worker can have the day off.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I have specifically asked to work holidays and I enjoy doing it. This is another way of giving.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">4. You can go Christmas caroling around the neighborhood or sign up to visit a nursing home or hospital on a holiday. Bringing in a simple program-- story-telling or singing-- is much appreciated there. </span><b style="font-size: x-large;">You can</b><span style="font-size: large;"> </span><b style="font-size: x-large;">take a newcomer with you.</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>A bunch of acquaintances and I did this one year in several neighborhoods. We had loads of fun. No one turned us away.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">5. If someone wishes you a "Merry Christmas" and you celebrate something else or nothing, it really does not hurt you to wish them a "Merry Christmas." Same goes for Hanukkah, the Winter Solstice, and Saturnalia. Recognizing people in the ways that they wish to be recognized does not diminish you as a human being.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I am an atheist and I do this. (I understand that some people will boycott stores whose employees are required to say "Merry Christmas." That is a matter of choice). Not everything that people say to each other has to be perceived of or ought to be perceived of as a personal affront.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">6. You can go to a meeting if that is something you do for your recovery. <b>You can take a newcomer with you.</b> </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>For those who attend meetings, why not?</i> </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">7. You can go to a clubhouse or other place that has an alkathon or narathon. You will find meetings there. Maybe even some food, games, and friendly faces. <b>You can take a newcomer with you.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I've spent several Thanksgivings and Christmases doing this and I had a blast.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">8. Instead of worrying that your Thanksgiving or Christmas will not be perfect, you can participate in a food or clothing or toy drive in your neighborhood. Instead of buying presents for other adults, you can give stuff away to the less fortunate. If you have your own computer, you probably have an extra coat or sweater kicking around in your closet. Or you can host your own dinner and invite people who don't have a place to go for the day.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Dad taught me early on to pick out gently used toys for the kids in a local orphanage. Yes, it is wonderful to be able to give to others instead of focusing on my hang-ups or have nervous attacks over something that is supposed to be fun.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">9. If you decide to brave being with family or friends who are not in recovery, you can grab a cup of coffee (or tea or hot chocolate or a combination of cranberry and orange juice warmed up in a microwave) instead of relapsing. You can also make an excuse and leave if you really must. You can call your sponsor or someone else in the rooms.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>A cup of coffee reminds me of my recovery because I first started drinking coffee in recovery.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">10. You can start your own traditions.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><u>sapphoq itching for a coffee says</u>: At all times, it helps me to remember why I am doing whatever I am doing. This includes family gatherings at Thanksgiving, Christmas, and other times of the year. When I get self-absorbed, I forget that not everything is "all about me." Because it really isn't. Just saying.</i></span><br />
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Thanks to #AddictionChat on Twitter for an excellent discussion about the holidays last Wednesday at 9 p.m. EST.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-82793390428509786462014-11-01T01:09:00.002+09:302014-11-01T01:09:39.746+09:30Atheists in Recovery and the Fundy Factor<br />
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<i><b>N.B. Absolutely no disrespect is intended to those of my close friends who identify as Christian, born-again Christian, fundamentalist Christian, or literal Christian. This piece is more a reflection on discrimination in the rooms of recovery directed at non-believers on the part of the more radical fundamentalist Christians who disrupt meetings with preaching and exhortation.</b></i><br />
<b> I love my conservative Christian friends. Period.</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Yes, we do exist. Maybe we never believed in any gods and came in not believing. Maybe we decided we didn't believe during adulthood and also came in not believing. Maybe we came in believing but in the course of our recovery embraced atheism. [I fit into the third category].</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Some newcomers are mad at their god or gods. They usually calm down after a bit and manage to forgive their deity or deities. They are not seeking information about atheism and that is their right. Some newcomers may have never been exposed to any teachings about divinity. Upon discovering that sort of thing, they become believers. That is also their right.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I am an atheist. I have thirty-four years of continuous clean time. The myth that "You must have a capital H Higher capital P Power" is a myth. There are more of us. I am not alone.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> The steps were written to be suggestions only. Check the writings of Bill W. as expressed in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous if you don't believe me. Bill W. also gave permission for the first Buddhist group to change the word "God" in the twelve steps to the word "good." See page 81.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> I don't pray. I don't meditate. I am not spiritual. I don't do woo woo. I had to rewrite the steps in order to be able to remain in recovery. And yes, I am very much in recovery.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Meetings vary according to geography. That is to be expected. In our area, there has been an increase in the expression of fundamentalist Christianity. I went to an A.A. meeting yesterday where an outspoken fundy got a few friends to chant "May you find Him now" and "God could and would if He were sought" during the reading of How It Works. Annoying? Well, yes. Also annoying is when the fundy chairs and absolutely refuses to call on me. For my part, I choose my battles today. Being ignored at a meeting by the chair is not such a big deal. The funny thing is, the fundy is an excellent chair who keeps the meeting moving and on track.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> N.A. meetings here are traditionally more free-wheeling. But even there, I have been told things like "You're not a true atheist. You believe in the woods." [Huh?]</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Alanon and Overeaters Anonymous have also fallen to the fundy factor round here. CoDA is a bit more lax. I haven't been to Gamblers Anonymous or to NicA. [No, I don't qualify for every XA program. They do have open meetings]. ACOA and ACA meetings are too full of pain and anguish for me to even consider going to them. Dual Recovery Anonymous has substituted "God of our understanding" but that program too has more religious members than not. </span><span style="font-size: large;">I've been to meetings across the country and the fundy factor is not as evident in some of those. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> It has never been my intention to convert people to atheism. And I refuse to do that now. The problem is when there is an overmuch of fundy talk, some new people are driven away. I do believe in equal time. At meetings when the fundy factor gets out of control, when it is my turn to talk [if I am not ignored by the one fundy chair] I let people know that belief is not required in order to work a solid program. Yes, sincere atheists in the rooms do tend to seek me out.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> I read a joke on-line recently while doing research for a small e-book I am writing about being an atheist in recovery. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Question: If you object to all of the God talk, why do you attend meetings?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Answer: I am part of the Newcomer Rescue Squad.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><u>sapphoq needing coffee says</u>: I don't exactly feel that way but there are days when I am getting closer.</i></span>sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1641475806263575782.post-29373490212806207652014-10-20T01:48:00.000+09:302014-10-20T01:48:33.721+09:30Dear Sis: to a family member new to recovery<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic7TNvkJT6Vgssxvthr6JGImjm0nzFZn-q_2TIeF6NTEMhRdc84n-0D1WgASmaH8BThM0LQpdTgYYa94PpK8b3hOn-A_GJCGJSh-I47goOfW1hSQF1KY47gcP7KWfqGbdC09wLDqodS6c/s1600/addictiondefn.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic7TNvkJT6Vgssxvthr6JGImjm0nzFZn-q_2TIeF6NTEMhRdc84n-0D1WgASmaH8BThM0LQpdTgYYa94PpK8b3hOn-A_GJCGJSh-I47goOfW1hSQF1KY47gcP7KWfqGbdC09wLDqodS6c/s1600/addictiondefn.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I made this. Download and save it somewhere on your computer if you wish to. Use it on the Internet if you wish to. Credit and link backs totally unnecessary. Screw the DMCA, copyright trolls, copyright monopolists and others of that ilk.</td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Dear Sis,</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> We've hardly talked in the past decade or two. It seems that you deal with me only when you have to. I don't know why that is. Any guesses would be mental masturbation. Maybe someday you will tell me what I did. Maybe you never will. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Yes, I've found your identities on the Internet. Yes, I've looked up anything you've made public in order to have a bit of a feeling for where your passions have led you. I am thrilled by your recent successes.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> I was disheartened to find that in your college years you were drinking and shoplifting. By your own account, you were buying from several liquor stores so that way "they wouldn't think [you were] an alcoholic." You organized shoplifting parties among your friends on weekends. I held my breath, hoping for some indication that you grew out of these things.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> By your recent report, you are feeling much better than you used to. You've quit drinking and smoking. [Was it cigarettes? Or weed? Or?]. You've shaped up and started taking better care of yourself. I feel both happy and sad at this news.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Pictures of wedding dressings and nurseries. A sense that I have been disposed of along with your ex and your bad habits. It's alright I guess. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Dad is getting closer to the end. You've already moved on in ways that I cannot understand. I too had a stepfather that I loved. [He died awhile back]. We are so different-- you and I-- yet something in you and something in me we both got from Dad. Please don't forget him as you continue on your orbit to the sun.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> Even if we never connect, I wish you the very best in your life. I hope that you will find more of what you are seeking. Most of all, I wish you peace.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> <i>~ the forgotten one ~</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"> </span>sapphoqhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14568663706406638643noreply@blogger.com0