Thursday, 14 August 2014
Not Co-Signing the B.S.
N.B. This post is poorly written. Mea culpa.
Fact: There are people in recovery who are unlovely. Unlovely: not lovable, loud and verbally abusive to others or to at least one other individual, making a scene, erupting at a perceived slight or insult, puffed-up with resentments, unable to get along with others, unpredictable in mood and/or actions, bringing up thinly disguised character assassination as a "topic."
There are people for whom I will never be good enough for. And there are people who I don't care to hang out with. That is my right and also yours.
I don't hang out with people who expect me to co-sign their b.s. This sort of negative contracting is more forgivable in newcomers to recovery than in folks who been here for several years plus. If you announce that your recovery comes first and for that reason you chose not to show up for your responsibilities today, I will figure you for some sort of lout-- the same sort of lout that I used to be. If you are cursing excessively or once again announcing before a meeting how pissed off you are at [whoever it is this week], more than likely I will not deem to take sides in your controversy. If you bring up a "topic" which is actually a story of how you had it out with someone else sitting there in the meeting, I will not endorse you for doing that. I don't have to.
There is a problem when any one of us expects the world to conform to our own standards, disabilities, desires, lusts, ideas, or hot-headedness. We have a responsibility to allow ourselves to blend in a bit with regular society as well as with each other. When some recovering person proclaims his or her greatness, infallibility, foxiness, and talent, I know for sure that he or she is not a gift.
sapphoq itching for a coffee says: I am very careful not to co-sign anyone's b.s.