If you look back on your life do you believe that you have
accomplished everything that you were born to accomplish? I mean I realize that
the last thing anyone really saw themselves doing when they got older is what
they are actually doing. When the obvious had hit me, somewhere around the age
of 25 that I wasn't going to be a rock star, a movie star, a master theologian,
or the myriad of other things I had explained responsibility away with. The
restaurant jobs I had supplemented dreaming with, had to come to an end.
Responsibility was never my strong suit, and believe it or not there is a lot
more responsibility that goes with a services job than people give them credit
for.
Of course my childhood was never plagued with the dreams of
being an extruder operator, an electro-mechanical assembler, or even a welder
which made up the 20s of my life. The 30s got more interesting for a bit when I
tried my hands at building Aegis systems, robots, and ovens for the Asian
soldering industry, but again, this wasn't a dream or a nightmare to the little
me I left behind. Neither were three divorces, well OK maybe since that’s how
famous people live, but I had always
wanted the children, just living in a mansion collecting royalties. Then again,
I had at least established that I was a pretty good worker when I wanted to be
by that time.
Believe it or not the first job I had actually settled into
and accepted as my own fate was being a janitor. I was good at it, not much was
expected of me, and I had a lot of time to goof off. Pretty sad if you think
about it, but I definitely didn't expect it to accidentally lead into a job as
an MRO (maintenance, repairs and operations) which is corporate speak for “I
buy stuff.” Nope I think back to when I was picturing myself as the lead singer
of the biggest band ever, or the multi-talented screenplay writer, who
coincidentally starred and directed in the movies because it was too important
to leave to anyone else, to even the recluse writing great novel after great
novel, and this just wasn't in there.
Well let’s get to the other things that weren't on the
radar. Never thought I would be a raging alcoholic before I even made it to 21.
Didn't think I would be sober since before I was 21 either. Talk about an
accomplishment but that is an absolute affront to my nature. Who knew I would
still do a lot of the dumb crap alcoholics who are drinking do while I was
sober? Well it makes for interesting tales anyway. Who would have thought I
would love my stupid job buying crap? Well the person who recruited me to do it
did, so I have to give him the kudos on that one, and of course my wife who
gave me the gentle nudges too.
All in all, the little Jeremy wouldn't like the big Jeremy.
Aside from the fact that little Jeremy was a dummy, he also didn't know that
there was anything else out there other than being a rock star, a famous
athlete, a movie star or even someone who had died at the age of 27 like all
the famous people in the sixties seemed to do. The good news is that the big
Jeremy likes the big Jeremy, and the big Jeremy also understands now that the
little Jeremy didn't know squat.
Now for a shameless plug. If you like to read whacky stuff,
from a whacko like this guy, you can always find the random crap that flows
through his mind at TheWhacko.Com. Thanks for making it this far!
2 comments:
Well I never saw myself still raising kids in my 50's, that's for sure! But then again, I couldn't see myself being without kids in my life either! Little Cathy wanted to be a pediatrician...bigger little Cathy wanted to be a child psychologist...biggest little Cathy is both (without the degree's or higher education!)!
I think I would have liked the younger me. Just not all day every day.
spike
ps great post Jer, and thanks!
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