Thursday, 28 June 2007

It Takes One To Know One...Then You Understand

Image borrowed from:

To understand one, you must be one. To understand why she did the things she did, you must walk in her shoes. A mother will do anything for her child, but a mother can only do what she knows. There are great mothers and not so great mothers, but in the end, they're one in the same because they only do what they know to be right for their child(ren), even if society and even family and friends may see it as being the wrong the end, it might have been the only way and thus the right way.

Truth can be hidden behind a shroud of lies and deception, but the truth can never be forgotten, nor destroyed. Truth seeks to be sought and thirsts to be known. In the end, truth comes out. Even with having been bound and blinded by lies and deception, she still knew them to be lies and deception. How else would a 5 year old know that she was not really wanted, know that she was always treated differently, sometimes worse than her could a 5 year old know beyond all doubt that she was a constant living reminder that her father had left them? But she knew.

They can deny the truth all they want, being the dysfunctional monsters in denial they are...but their actions, past and present, speak much louder than their words. And sometimes their actions matched their words. Spoken and unspoken, she knew she was and would never be good enough for them. They would tell her she's smart, intelligent, but they'd treat her like a mentally retarded child and talk about her amongst themselves in what they thought was "code" but she knew, she knew who "she" was, and I know who she is...because "she" is me.

The words that spilled from their lips...

They said she was wonderful.
They said she was great.
They said she was intelligent.
They said she was beautiful.

But what they really said was...

She was never good enough.
She was too lazy.
She was too stupid.
She was too fat.
She was too ugly.

But now, she knows the truth. She knows she's better than them. She knows she's intelligent. She knows she's wonderful. She knows she needs to improve her health and weight, but that's okay. She knows she's not ugly. She knows that despite all the shitty things they've done to her, she's a great mother. She knows that her mother did the best she could. She knows all she needs is her son and her fiance that adore her.

Nothing else matters.

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