Friday 29 August 2008

A Murder of Crows - Volume 21

It’s getting pretty old at this point, but I have to thank my ex-wife for finally forcing me to put a lot of things into perspective yesterday. She didn’t do it on purpose of course, but she did all the same, and as always forced me into a situation that I wasn’t very comfortable with. This isn’t exactly her method of operation, but with it all becoming quite old, it is also getting to the point where you just can’t cover up for her neglect anymore either. This is how it worked yesterday.

There was a phone call, and it was “that woman” who wanted to talk to her youngest daughter. It appears that she just remembered that her birthday was around now, and she figured that she should call and talk to her. Imtoocutus wasn’t exactly thrilled to talk to her, because like the oldest daughter she has learned the proper emotions that someone should have towards a mother like hers. The phone call was two days late for any proper birthday wishes, and Imtoocutus didn’t even bother to correct her on any of it. Her only intention was to get the phone out of her hands and into the hands of anyone but her. This is the way that Lazius Boycrazius would treat her mother as well, and it is simply systematic of how daughters relate to their mothers, especially if they are bad mothers. Problems start at this point as she hands the phone to Captain ADHD {a boy and incapable of ever truly comprehending how rotten his mother is .. genetics} and he takes the phone down to his bedroom to talk to her for an hour.

She filled his head with all of the shit that she always does. Told him about all the things she has at her apartment, her new snake, the bedroom she made for him, the toys she has been collecting for him, how she would love to see him but nobody will bring him out there, etc etc etc. I’ve said it enough that she is just the most evil woman on the planet, and clinical definitions of issues that only Oprah Winfrey could love doesn’t change the fact that at this point the only good thing she could do for her children is kill herself. I know it sounds pretty bad to say something like that but bear with me as I proceed further. In any regard, my son, as always gets to spend the first week of school, the week before his birthday, and the most hectic time of his father’s life, miserable and crying because his mother is a monster. I was at a total loss, and devoid of time to comprehend the proper way to deal with this. I had already gotten up 2 hours early to take my father to the doctor, and was sick as a dog from all the extra burdens this week. I decided to just lay it all out on the table for him.

The first thing I did was I sat him down and decided to just start with right and wrong. I explained to him that he is a little boy, and little boys are supposed to be taken care of by their parents. It doesn’t sink in all that great at first, so I had to elaborate, and this is where my own feelings started getting in the way. I told him about when he was living with his mother, and how I used to come and pick him up every other weekend. He remembered this so, I continued rationally. I said to him that I used to drive 5 hours to get here, 2 hours to pick him up, 2 hours to get back here, and then we spent 2 days here. I told him then that I would drive 2 hours to take him back home, 2 hours to get back here, and then 5 hours to get back to my home in New York. He comprehended that really fast actually when he said that it was 18 hours of driving every other weekend, and I said that it was MY responsibility as his parent to do that and I never gave him a hard time about it. He agreed. I then pointed out the contrast that in 6 years his mother has driven here to see him 2 or 3 times, and she can come see him every Saturday if she wants, and she only lives an hour away. If anything he at least comprehended why his sisters hate their mother.

At this point I had to be rather cunning in explaining to him that daddy has to work {and his mother doesn’t}, daddy has to organize trips to the zoo and the amusement park etc for him, his sisters and all of their friends {and his mother doesn’t} and most importantly that daddy does it because it is part of his responsibility as a parent. I added all of their sports {at two different schools} doctor’s appointments, library trips, grocery shopping, and a host of other things daddy has to do for them and himself, and then asked him if he could understand why he doesn’t have time to take them an hour each way to see their mother who won’t make the trip themselves? I absolutely hate the fact that that freak of a pathetic excuse for a mother {a fucking mother of all creatures!} forced me to have to have that talk with my son. This is the bulk of the reason that my oldest daughter can’t be trusted alone in the same room with her mother. As much as she dislikes her brother and sister, she hates her mother {really really hates her mother} because of this type of crap. I’ve had to hold her as she cried through long diatribes about how she hates her mother for doing this to her brother, and no matter what any of us do we just can’t keep her from damaging him at will.

I also had to have the talk with him about responsibility. This is not an easy talk with any child much less one that has ADHD big time, and misses his mommy. I had to ask him if he understood why he gets punished for things. In a roundabout sort of way we came to the conclusion that he is punished so he will admit what he did and then hopefully not do it again. Sometimes he scares me at how easily he just “gets it” sometimes, but he reasoned out rather quickly that his mother blames everyone else for everything. He even started saying how he wished that he could just meet with his mother at the court house like he used to, but then changed his tune when he remembered on his own that they can’t. He remembered on his own that they can’t because she couldn’t follow the rules, and then even noted that she still blames everyone else for that too. In the end of the conversation I had to head off to work, and I had a crying 9 year old boy clutched to me. This is simply more of the wonderful things that the so called “mother” of these children doesn’t have to deal with when she creates this kind of damage. Aside from the fact that she would never reduce herself to going to a job either, she wouldn’t take something like this head on and would simply assign names to blame.

Needless to say I had the wonderful job of filling out an inch thick stack of paperwork for all of my kid’s schools last night after work. These things seem trivial but they grate on me. I do all the hard work, get no support whatsoever {financial or emotional} from their mother, and as always I just hang myself on the cross out front in an attempt to be above all of that. She sweeps in every few months and damages her son, and for what? Her desperate need to control all of these scenarios has forced me to treat her like an enemy combatant, and I would be an idiot if I didn’t. You really need to think about it all to truly grasp the situation as it stands. Mother’s are supposed to be the one person in the world that loves you and cares for you above all other things. This mother won’t even visit her kids because she has to have them in her world. In her dangerous, irresponsible, state certified unsafe, world of despair, misery and much much worse, and if she doesn’t get it then she will completely destroy her only son to get it. Most people can’t even comprehend doing this, and there is a reason for it! It is below the level of “normal evil” that the average person can even comprehend. It will take an army of Oprah Winfrey’s to convince me of anything different ;8o)

Other Crap This Weirdo Publishes... Mental Notes& Random Musings {Daily Blog} The Crow's Nest {The Homepage of J~ Crow}

Nothing that was printed here was intended to offend anyone, and if it did, screw ya, you begged for it. If you believe that there are some measures that can be taken to change me, then please feel free to pray for me, and while you are at it yourself, because you read this far, and if you hated every minute of it, then you are an idiot, not me, or the other people who like what I have to say! .. Jeremy

All writings Copyright © 2008 .. The Crow's Nest

Saturday 16 August 2008

A Murder of Crows - Volume 20

I probably should have stayed in bed. I don’t know what the hell was up with me while I tried to sleep today, but I kept waking up with the strangest dreams. Most of them involved my cat, which was a bit strange, but at the same time wasn’t completely unexpected. The stupid thing meowls like it’s in heat all the time, and refuses to keep a non nocturnal sleeping pattern, so it has been getting on everyone’s nerves around here pretty badly. Then there is the other problem where it is an eight year old cat, and my aunt’s three year old cat happens to be a bully. For those of you that have been reading my writings for a while, you can understand that my aunt’s brain turns to tapioca pudding when animals are involved so she doesn’t get the animal structure in the house through her rosey colored glasses.

Now does this mean that Duchess {my cat} gets beaten up by Lucy {her cat} all the time? Not in the least, and this is the part of it all that is so hard to explain unless you have one of those relatives that seems to have brain damage when pets are concerned. Her cat is a bully, and a con man just like most cats are, so she torments the dogs when nobody is looking, and runs the house with an iron fist. Duchess prefers to sleep all day, and is unimpressed with such Animal Farm style hierarchical structure, and allows Lucy to do whatever she does upstairs while she sleeps in the basement. Now of course my aunt {animal disfunctionate} will not listen to any one of the six other people in the house that try to explain to her that her cat terrorizes the house, just like the four dogs, and six cats that we have buried in the back yard that belonged to her {long story .. all buried there before she moved in .. I practically run the dysfunctional pet cemetery in town} and that will never change. Life in Tinsel Town goes on.

Duchess is the new cat in the house, much older, and subjected to a house full of cats before going to the Animal Shelter, full of cats, and then here to a house full of dogs and a cat. She knows how to play the game, and she appears to be an unusually gifted cat when it comes to getting what she wants. The obvious tone that she uses when she caterwauls all note either screams “feed me,” “play with me,” pay attention to me,” or in some cases “get up you lazy asses,” and gets what she wants when she wants it. Night time is also the time when she deals with certain “issues” that the dogs don’t seem to have the intelligence to take care of during the day. When Lucy comes downstairs to push Duchess around she usually encounters a surprise that befuddles her poor little bullying brain, which usually ends up in my aunt’s bedroom with Lucy hiding under the bed and Duchess trying to tear her apart. This in turn causes my aunt to ream the rest of us out for letting Duchess bully her poor defenseless cat, and the rest of us wanting to take her poor defenseless cat and put it where her last six poor defenseless cats ended up! It shows a certain level of cunning in her cat to end up in the one place where manipulation will create the sympathy required to keep her iron paw on the pulse of what is going on in the house, but again we are dealing with an unstable individual as it pertains to animals.

Needless to say after a night of nightmares that were along the lines of waking up to all the animals in the house being killed by Lucy the spawn of Satan and a stray cat that he had in a drunken night of indiscretion, I woke up late. It wouldn’t have been too bad except it pushes my schedule back an hour, which changes my usual daily activities just enough to make me a bit grumpy. The first of which is having to go to the gym when my usual cast of characters have gone home and a new cast of characters are there. This is both a good and a bad thing. The good part of it all is that all of the mentally handicapped people from the group home are in there after I leave. It’s good for the soul to walk into the place and be greeted by eight people that are genuinely happy to see you, very interested in how your day is going, and very happy to tell you about their own day. I don’t know all of their names but I get a smile when they are all around because they are very nice people. The fact that they are escorted in by a bunch of hotter than hell grad students who serve as their aides doesn’t hurt either, but they don’t seem as happy to see me.

The bad side is the “Jump Nazis” that now fill the gym usually after I leave, and are the reason I get up a bit early to make sure that I can get into the gym and out again before they get there. Most of these are college students, but they have been recruiting lately and walking into the joint was almost dangerous. These guys and girls usually take very heavy weights and stand in the middle of the walkways and jump up and down, or do very long sweeping motions with them making the place almost closed down the whole time they are in there. Today in particular they had just about every square inch of walkway covered by each of them holding Olympic size bars {seven feet, fifty five pounds} and jumping up and down blocking every machine in the joint. My mentally handicapped little buddies were all huddled in the corner practically watching them. After catching up with my little buddies I proceeded to walk through all the Jump Nazis to get to all the machines I needed. The trick is to not humor people like this in the least.

The icing on the cake was when my mentally handicapped little buddies left and the Jump Nazis decided to have a huddle and start talking loudly about all of them. I tried to do my preacher curls and ignore them all until one of them decided that it was important to talk about Jerry {the one that has to have a guide dog as he is also a severe stroke victim} and they all were whining like crybabies about how the dog was going to cause an accident. My years of going to this particular gym, that dog has been completely unassuming and usually lounged around behind the machines and completely out of the way. I wish the Jump Nazis would learn from his example, but I saw an opportunity to do something I like to do from time to time, and couldn’t help myself. This would be pissing off a large number of people, many of which are much bigger than me, in a fit of self righteous indignation. Its fun, you all should try it some time. I piped up from my preacher bench, “Unlike a bunch of two hundred pound people jumping around in every free space in the place with seven foot iron poles on their shoulders,” which elicited the type of response one would have expected. It just goes to show that steroids and animal fur make some people impossible to deal with ;8o)

Other Crap This Weirdo Publishes... Mental Notes& Random Musings {Daily Blog} The Crow's Nest {The Homepage of J~ Crow}

Nothing that was printed here was intended to offend anyone, and if it did, screw ya, you begged for it. If you believe that there are some measures that can be taken to change me, then please feel free to pray for me, and while you are at it yourself, because you read this far, and if you hated every minute of it, then you are an idiot, not me, or the other people who like what I have to say! .. Jeremy

All writings Copyright © 2008 .. The Crow's Nest

Wednesday 13 August 2008

Spike's Wishes

Spike's Wishes for All of Us:

Oh that today we not afraid of our essential solitude!
That we are able to extract what joy there may be in life today wherever we may be.
For life is sacred and we don't really know how long we have here.
Let us celebrate life deeply.

Wherever we are, that we don't have too many regrets over what could have been.
That when we are stuck, we remember that we have options even if we do not know recognize them yet.
Knowing that all of us are capable of great things that go unacknowledged,
That we will find those great things and do them anyway.

Oh that we embrace all of who we are!
That we love carefully and selectively and honestly.
That we do not negate our selves for the benefit of others
who would use and abuse us.

To know as much happiness as we have known pain,
as much love as we have known hatred,
as much comfort as we have known heartbreak.
That we keep striving until we can strive no more.


*posting from a library in the middle of nowhere island maine.
*will be back in civ Sunday night.

Wednesday 6 August 2008

Dear Asswipe 7/5/08

A big fuck you going out to V.E.S.I.D. for operational failure.
Taking the side of the stoopid job developer in demanding I get a "return to work" note for a vertigo attack-- bovine fecal matter.
Furthermore, as far as "return to work," what work?
Screw off.
If you aren't going to help me, then get the fuck out of my way.

No love,
the traumatic brain-injury malcontent on your overflowing caseload.

Monday 4 August 2008

The Crow Murders Movies - Volume 1

I had one of those off days last night when all of my friends were either off making better friends, working over time or doing things that I wasn’t included in {thank God} which left me time to take my daughter out to the movies. She had been nagging to go out with my friends and me on Saturday nights {which ain’t gonna happen because I need ME time sometimes} so it made pretty good sense all around. The movie we went to see was “Hellboy 2 The Golden Army” as I figured it was best to see wholesome entertainment in an effort to raise my child properly, and it was a delightful surprise all around.

Don’t get me wrong or anything here, because I realize the movie made money and all, but relatively speaking, it wasn’t the box office bash that many of the other movies out there can brag about being. I can almost understand this as I have found that most of the really good movies don’t do very well, and the intolerable movies are pure gold {see my review on “There Will Be Blood” as in shooting out of your eyes for having watched that crap} and that is how Hollywood works. Hellboy 2 was one of the best movies I had seen in a very long time. It likened me back to the feeling I had when I saw Terminator 2, in the sense that it was the sequel to a decent movie, but completely blew the first one away, and more over could stand perfectly fine on its own. My daughter who had never seen the first one was easily enamored with the movie and even was able to pick up quickly on the subtle humor that should have been left over from the first, but again stood well on its own.

Truth be told, the movie not only had a great story line, but they took impeccable steps to polish all of the details. Certain areas of the movie that easily could have been washed off as fill, were crammed together with brilliantly thought out humor that added to the story, and left me feeling particularly happy with the outcomes. Without spoiling the movie the most important part I can think of is that they made damn sure that the “bad guy” in the movie {although more misguided and perhaps a martyr more than anything} was without a doubt, the baddest mother fucker I had personally ever seen in a movie. Not so much because he was unmitigated evil, or anything like that, but more because he was someone that actually could take on the “Prince of Hell” {which Hellboy for the most part is regardless of which hat he wears on Earth} and make you believe that he was every bit his match. The character building, and the “dirty little secret” that went on throughout the movie was also well thought out and quite engaging.

The only knock I can put on Hellboy 2 is the fact that its one hour and fifty minutes of entertainment was sketched together so perfectly that it flew by in a haze. It’s probably going to require another sitting, or at the very least it is going to need to be in my DVD collection the second it makes it to the Wal-Mart shelves, but I am already clamoring for another one. They built a rather intriguing story that was going well beyond the boundaries of the movie anyway, so I am assuming that they already have those ambitions, but you never know {remember Remo Williams?} what will happen in the minds of the Hollyweird. Should Hellboy 3 find its way into a theatre near me I can assure you that it will be one of the few movies that has me in there on the first night come hell or high water. Pardon the pun. Along those lines, despite how bad I though “The Order of the Phoenix” was, I can assure you that Harry Potter might be the other one.

Now to contrast this with the other “Comic Book” movie out in the theaters, I did end up seeing “The Dark Knight” which of course had been another one of those “Must See” movies for me this summer. Although it was a good movie {note the lack of “very” in there} it couldn’t wipe Hellboy 2’s ass in just about every aspect of entertainment value. Heath Leger went out with a very good performance, as I thought he would, but the part became far too droll to comprehend after a while, and the ending left a lot to be desired. The ending of Hellboy 2, and more over the bad guy {and towards the end his army of minions} that Hellboy had to deal with made Batman and the Joker look like unimpressive school children. Of course in all fairness, Hellboy 2 wasn’t even the best movie I saw this year, but that was only the fate of being released the same year as Indiana Jones, which despite the fact that it could have crossed that barrier of going “one too many times to the well” was also a masterful piece and more importantly, tied up all of the loose ends of all the Indiana Jones movies perfectly. It was almost like a gift to the fans of Indiana Jones, while Hellboy 2 was more like a treat to fans of great action movies ;8o)

Other Crap This Weirdo Publishes... Mental Notes& Random Musings {Daily Blog} The Crow's Nest {The Homepage of J~ Crow}

Nothing that was printed here was intended to offend anyone, and if it did, screw ya, you begged for it. If you believe that there are some measures that can be taken to change me, then please feel free to pray for me, and while you are at it yourself, because you read this far, and if you hated every minute of it, then you are an idiot, not me, or the other people who like what I have to say! .. Jeremy

All writings Copyright © 2008 .. The Crow's Nest